A Story About a Church
Once upon a time, a young pastor and his wife planted a church. The church grew and grew. People were drawn to this pastor, and his skill in speaking and teaching. The young church recruited professional quality musicians to lead worship and still more people came. As the church grew, the church added ministries for children and youth. Within a short few years, the average attendance was 180 to 200. People who visited talked about how accepting the church was, and how sitting through one of the sermons always spoke to them… almost like going to therapy.
The church’s initial target population were alternative, twenty-somethings. The people who actually came were young families. Most came from other churches, and many talked about experiencing wounding in their former church experiences. They wanted to worship God, but they didn’t want to stay where they were. So they looked at the competition and chose the exit option.
As time went on, the young church plateaued. Perhaps the novelty wore off. Attendance declined a little, perhaps by ten percent, but it wasn’t seen as significant. People were still coming. The children’s programs were thriving. The teaching was still compelling.
An opportunity arose to change locations and share space with another church with similar values. The church members voiced support of this move, and so it was made. All the same, perhaps another twenty-five or thirty people exited the church when it moved. They didn’t say much. They simply left. The leadership took a look at issues that might have precipitated the departures, and it was concluded that when a church experiences a significant shift, some people just leave. It was no big deal.
When the church turned ten, two more significant changes came. The partner church with whom they shared space decided that they needed the space, and told the young church to move. And the founding pastor, loved by many, decided that God was calling him in another direction. Boom. Boom. Within six months nearly half the church left, most without words, simply choosing the exit option. There were other churches with inspiring teachers, closer to home.
A new, younger pastor was hired after much searching and prayer. Many church members were involved in the search process. All were invited to hear the candidates speak and participated in Q&A. The Board members all experienced unique, unexplained events via dreams and prayers that this was the right man to hire.
Another twenty or so members exited. The worship team became less specialized. The children’s programs were condensed.
The new pastor urged the church to consider new models of being the church. Outreach. Prayer. Relationship. Through much teaching and discussion the church decided to move toward a home church model, and divided into three house churches, meeting collectively once a month. A few more exited. And then after less than two years, the young pastor left. Three house churches became two… became one.
It sounds like a sad story. And at times it has been quite painful. But this one house church, now perhaps ten percent the size of the church at its peak, thrives in many ways. It serves the vulnerable and excluded in ways that it formerly did not. All of the members have a place to serve and participate – and they do. Regular service in a low income, older adult trailer park has brought new people to the church. Though the new people are … scratchy, difficult, even hard to love. But they feel like they belong. And people believe, are discipled, and baptized. People who watch this church who are not church goers say that this is the kind of church they would go to. If they went to church.
The story of this church – my church – highlights some of the themes that political economist Albert O. Hirschman wrote about in “Exit, Voice and Loyalty.”(1) Hirschman argues that when quality in an organization declines, consumers/members express their dissatisfaction through two possible options: Exit and Voice. Exit is exactly what it sounds like. They leave the organization or stop buying the product. This is typically the easiest route when there is easily accessible competition of equal or comparable quality. Those who leave first usually have the least invested in the organization or product or can tolerate the least amount of increased expense (be it time, travel or cost). Voice refers to the consumer’s choice to express their dissatisfaction through dialogue, often urging a return to the former quality.
My church spent many hours, months and years engaging in dialogue and prayer. We dreamed together. We prayed together. We hosted small groups on re-defining church. We built deep friendships. Yet people still left. Why? Some opted for a church closer to home. Some wanted a vibrant children’s or youth ministry. Some just wanted the old pastor back. Some simply left and did not go to another church. (We’ll come back to that thought in a moment). For those of us who remain, each of us have prayed and sought the Lord about the status and future of the church. We have engaged in a coaching relationship with our denomination. We don’t have an official pastor, but there are a few of us who serve on our shared leadership team. Most of us have wondered more than once if it was time to go. Hirschman might argue that we stay out of loyalty. He writes:
In deciding whether the time has come to leave an organization, members, especially the more influential ones, will sometimes be held back not so much by the moral and material sufferings they would themselves have to go through as a result of exit, but by the anticipation that the organization to which they belong would go from bad to worse if they left.(2)
I confess that at times this has been true. But even greater is a factor to which Hirschman does not speak: God. Each of us has prayed diligently, and even asked God, “Should we close? Should we walk away?” And each of us can say without a doubt that God, so far, has asked us to stay. And so we are planning the baptism of a giant, mentally ill, impoverished, socially awkward man who came to faith this summer but who would otherwise never go to church. There is still fruit. In the eyes of man, this church is probably a failure. In the eyes of God? We continue to be blessed.
A final thought: Hirschman argues that people exit to other competition. He even says that people can’t leave certain social institutions, namely church.(3) And yet many of those who left my church, didn’t go to another church. And as one of our cohort posted this week, research by the Barna group suggests that a growing number of Americans who don’t go to church, used to go to church. (4) They are opting out. Exiting. I wonder what they are choosing as an alternative? Perhaps our friend Carol McLaughlin will discover the answer in her research about post-church boomers.
(1) Albert O. Hirschman, Exit, Voice, and Loyalty: Responses to Decline in Forms, Organizations and States, Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 1970.
(2) Ibid, p 98.
(3) Ibid, 33.
(4) Barna Group, “Five Trends Among the Unchurched”, https://www.barna.org/barna-update/culture/685-five-trends-among-the-unchurched#.VECXyRZgGSr.
About the Author
Julie Dodge
Julie loves coffee and warm summer days. She is an Assistant Professor of Social Work at Concordia University, Portland, a consultant for non-profit organizations, and a leader at The Trinity Project.13 responses to “A Story About a Church”
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Julie, bless you for this story of your church. What a wonderful post, filled with a lot of truth and wisdom. I am reminded of Eugene Peterson’s book about pastoring where he uses Jonah as the example for pastors. Jonah was called a place he didn’t want to be, but it was where God could use him in the most powerful way. He tried to EXIT, believing somewhere else was the better place to be! But he had it wrong. There was no better place to be then where God had placed him! I am glad you stayed, and the Nineveh that you are working is (obvious from your post) where God can use you (and your church) to do the most good. I see so clearly today a great lack of any kind of loyalty: a concern for others whom God would have us serve who are more important than whether I like the worship style or the shape of the building, or the kind of donuts being served (though that is important!). The story of your church truly gives me joy and hope…that some out there get what it is all about. Keep up the good work, Julie.
Thank you for the words of encouragement, John. It has at times seemed like a Ninevah, and other times like such a privilege and joy. One of the things we have stressed among our long timers is staying and serving not out of obligation, but because we are continuously seeking God’s strength and joy. There’s faithfulness and obedience, but then there’s always the risk of resentful, self driven obligation. The latter sucks the joy out of you. The former keeps us in Gods hands.
Julie …
Such a rich reflection on the process, evolution and transformation of your faith community. In my present context, which is mostly a suburban church one, most people do seem to move from one church to another. Last semester I interviewed several pastors/pastoral staff to talk about “exit.” Not one had a formal process where individuals can “say” why they are living. It highlighted a huge crevasse that exists all the while recognizing that some people do not want to explain “why.”
Exit, even “death” of sorts can mean new beginnings. I think it takes courage to step into what might be rather than try to create what was. As I continue in my studies I wonder at the influence of consumerism upon churches — perhaps people “exit” in part because the model we are so accustomed to has such strong consumeristic ties. In those I have interviewed that have left the church … I doubt any will return. They are done with what they have experienced, yet how will they grow? What does faith look like in practice for those that leave? Your work and your faith community’s commitment are providing an important voice.
I like your comment about stepping into what might be as opposed to what once was. It’s funny how the past gets brought in. Sometimes with fondness and perhaps nostalgic longing. But sometimes it’s with a negative recollection of some of the flaws of our former church culture. Which frustrates me because we are nothing like the old church. That said – one of the things that has been inspiring about our move to a very non traditional house church is WHO we are. We are middle aged for the most part and people our age aren’t always known for radical institutional change. Yet here we are, living out something quite different and seeing God continue to work in our hearts and minds.
By the way Carol, I hear you met one of my former students this weekend. Eli thought you were pretty cool.
This is such a sobering story to read, Julie. Thanks for sharing what you have lived out over these years. I would agree with Carol’s comments above regarding the influence of consumerism that tells us that exit is the natural reaction. Certainly, in my role, I have recognized that despite our best intentions, very rarely will people honestly talk about the reasons for “exit”. Knowing that, however, should cause us, as those who serve in leadership, to be intentionally sensitive to the nuances of voice. The commitment of your house church to effectively minister to those around you is to be commended. No questions, just appreciation, and my desire to pray for your church family and celebrate how God will continue to use you all.
Thanks Deve.
Isn’t it just so sad how Christians exit from churches on this magnitude. It’s hard to believe what your church has been through, but I saw the same thing in another church here Wales. Now they’re down to about 20 from about 120 ten years ago.
But praise God for the fruit God is still bearing in your church! It sounds to me that the culture of your church changed. Now you’re reaching the hurting, those who society doesn’t love, you’re reaching those who know their need of God. Sounds like a precious work is going on. Amen.
I pray God blesses your church richly and that God is glorified through it 🙂
Thanks Liz. We are indeed seeing God work in the most unlikely places, be it among those who don’t feel welcome in mainstream society, such as our trailer park friends, or those who don’t feel welcome by traditional churches, such as many of my friends. When you aren’t trying to be the newest hip church and just trying to follow God, things indeed change.
Julie,
Wow what a journey you have described. In the church that I pastored, one of the reasons I stayed longer than expected was that I had that loyalty that Hirschman spoke of. When I become Sr. Pastor I told the Elders I would give them 5 years. At 6 1/2 years the Lord began to talk to be about leaving but I stayed another year and it was the worst year of the entire 11 1/2 that I was fully at that church. My wife says that I was too loyal to the little church and our entire family suffered for it.
On a side note, I suggested a book that Carol should write as her artifact. Maybe you could help me convince her to write it.
McLaughlin, Carol. When the Church no Longer Smells Like Incense: Why Many Have Left the Church and How Christ Still Loves Them. Portland, OR: IVP. 2017.
Hohn – LOVE that title for Catol’s book! Carol? What do you think?
Ok, working in my iPad which autocorrected “ohhhh” to Hohn. Silly autocorrect….
Julie,
I don’t have a lot to offer on your post, but I really appreciated it.
Loss, shrinking, “exit” is so hard…especially for those remaining.
Your story does remind me of my friend Paul Sparks who is part of the Parish Collective and how he shrank his large church down to an “inconsequential” (used ironically) neighborhood gathering.
He and two other friends have written a book. Perhaps it might be meaningful?
http://www.newparish.org