The Most Powerful Man in the World and…. My Dad
About ten years ago my sister was working as the activities director at a nursing home in my home town. One day former president George H. W. Bush and his wife Barbara stopped by to say hello to the residents of the home. Mr. Bush’s summer home in Kennebunkport, Maine is about eight miles from my parents home, as such his being in the area was not a surprise. My sister was involved in organizing his visit which provided her access to the former president. Mr. Bush was always one of my father’s favorite presidents, so my sister asked him if it would be possible for my dad to come say hi. Mr. Bush kindly said yes then had my sister give one of his secret service agents her and my dad’s details and they scheduled a time for them to visit. The day came, my dad and my sister went down to Mr. Bush’s house (its location is very well known in the area), the appropriate security checks were done, then my dad and Mr. Bush talked with each other. For a full two hours they went back and forth discussing politics, the military, and mostly fishing. This man who at one point was, arguably, the most powerful man in the world took two hours out of his day to talk with my dad, who the history books will forget.
In The Dark Side Of Transformational Leadership: A Critical Perspective Tourish decries the trend of promoting “transformational” leadership as the ideal version of a leader. He argues that this sort of leadership promotes demagoguery and cult like behavior.1It is no surprise to anyone who pays attention to group dynamics and has found himself in the orbit of a transformational leader what a problem this sort of leadership can be. The requirement of absolute agreement and tyrannical behavior when things do not go quite to plan and the reaction of followers to circle the wagons around the leader can be at the very least terrifying.
As much as this sort of leadership is of fashion there is a way out of it. Tourish provides some examples of ways to make leadership less cult-like and more ‘rooted in a profound appreciation of context, an understanding of the limitations inherent to leader agency and an acknowledgment of the agency of others’ 2 By finding a value in the others around them leaders can avoid the pitfall of seeing themselves as messianic figures for their organizations.
By all accounts my dad’s experience with Mr. Bush was not an exception. Mr. Bush’s humility was a common theme by those who spoke of him just after his death this past November.3 It was this humility that helped him to move the world past the cold war, to achieve legislative victories and treaties, and to garner a fan for life out of my dad. This is not to say that he did not have faults, he certainly did, but a healthy amount of humility can help to overcome a plethora of faults.
It would be great if more of the popular leadership writers started to heed Tourish’s warnings about transformational leadership. Unfortunately there is something in much of the human psyche that likes the idea of being large and in charge, which makes selling books telling people how to become a transformational leader incredibly profitable. Humility does not sell real well, so we are probably in for more failures because of it before people in positions of power start to acknowledge its dark side.
In spite of his faults, the world could use more leaders like Mr. Bush, if only for his humility.
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1. Tourish, Dennis. The Dark Side of Transformational Leadership: a Critical Perspective. (Hove: Routledge, 2013). 12-13.
2. ibid 213
3. Driscoll, Kelsey. “Colin Powell Recalls George H.W. Bush’s Humility as Central to His Success.” AOL.com. Last modified December 2, 2018. https://www.aol.com/article/news/2018/12/02/colin-powell-recalls-george-hw-bushs-humility-as-central-to-his-success/23606544/.
About the Author
Sean Dean
An expat of the great state of Maine where the lobster is cheap and the winters are brutal I've settled in as a web developer in Tacoma, Washington. As a foster-adoptive parent of 3 beautiful boys, I have deep questions about the American church's response to the public health crisis that is our foster system.14 responses to “The Most Powerful Man in the World and…. My Dad”
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This was a good, heartwarming post, Sean. I bet your Dad and President Bush had a great conversation that day. I appreciated your remarks about humility being a significant part of the dismantling of problematic transformational leadership. That’s definitely something we’re not seeing enough of in our current President.
Thank you Karen. I feel like humility is the trait most often missed when describing a good leader. I was doing everything I could do to not make this a screed against our current president, so I had to think back to presidents I respected.
George Bush also was a college baseball player so he has that going for him as well.
Heartwarming is right. Amazing story about both your father and a highly influential public figure. Thank you for raising humility as such an imperative trait.
I didn’t know he played college baseball, that’s bonus points for him. It does seem that all the best leaders have humility, even if it’s not generally acknowledged.
Sean, A great post because of your recognition and promotion of humility. As you can tell from my posts, I think Tourish was off in equating proud, manipulative leadership with transformative leadership. I believe humility, admission of wrongs, and forgiveness (both given and received) are the essence of transformative leadership. You have reminded us that is what made Bush Sr. a great leader and president. You are so right this will never sell books, seminars, workshops, or give its adherents a thrill. However, that does not mean it is not right or preferred in all settings for all times. Many blessings and thanks so much for reminding me what is most important.
It feels like there are multiple definitions of transformative leadership – at least one as Tourish defines it and one how you define it. I don’t think either of you are wrong, you’re just working on opposing definitions of a term.
Sean, I agree that humility is the key to truly being a good leader, transformational or otherwise. One of the reporters in Washington DC told Bush Sr. that while he was flying to other states to fish, that there were great fishing spots he was missing in the DC area. Bush Sr. took him up on the fishing in DC and he really enjoyed the trip. This does show that Bush Sr. was open to a sort of upward feedback, which shows his humility. Kudos also to your dad for even asking to talk to the president. He obviously thought enough of himself to believe he was worthy enough to meet the president. Great story!
That’s a great story and emblematic of his ability to listen to others “below his station.” I bet living in DC you hear all sorts of stories about the leaders of our nation. How do you keep from getting completely jaded? Thanks for sharing.
Shaun – humility is such a critical and under-rated aspect of leadership. You are right on. I had a mentor tell me that the most confident leaders are the most humble. I have a tough time wrapping my head around the interplay of those two things in my personal life but know there is a connection there. They go together. And humility keeps us open to others and making space for others to be at the table.
To often I think humility is considered to be just a personality trait without any benefit to the leader. As you say it provides a place at the table for unexpected voices that can be truly transformative in the long run.
Thanks, Sean. I love this story and it reminds me of a quote I heard years ago about leaders, “The truly great ones always have time for you.” This was in reference to looking for mentors and your story affirms that once again. I recently encountered several CEOs of well known companies and walking away from our time that was the common trait I described about each of them, truly humble people. It may not sell books, but their success is undeniable if we will just pay attention and see it as the key.
That’s some good advice you were given. I’ve read that in spite of the popular notion of the visionary lead that the best CEOs are able to compile the input of everyone around them and gather a direction. I think humility is definitely part of that trait and I think that’s truly transformative.
Hi Sean. There are many things to like about Tourish, but the one thing I didn’t like was how disparaging he was on servant, humble leadership model. I’m encouraged to know the humility of one of our presidents was considered a value in his leadership.
It’s interesting with Bush that his humility made him a good leader, but it also lead to his demise on the campaign trail. He arguably deserved a second term more than either of the next two presidents after him (one of whom was his son). He lost his re-election because his soft spoken, listen to everyone character was trampled over by a very charismatic person. Humility will get lost when compared to charisma.