The All Embracing Struggle
- Summary of my most deeply held convictions before the readings and why I have these beliefs.
My first encounter with my whiteness occurred as a young teen when I was visiting my dad’s extended family in Michigan for a family reunion. I clearly remember sitting in a Pizza Hut as I heard my grandpa and great aunts and uncles talk about my dad’s cousin. She had brought a gentleman with her to the reunion who was (whisper) Black! She was not present in this conversation; it was all said behind her back. I honestly don’t remember what was said about this relationship or him, but I do remember a deep, sickening feeling in my gut that something was wrong. I was profoundly uncomfortable and remember walking outside to escape the conversation. I grew up in North Dakota with 99% white people around me and one native American. So I don’t know where the conviction came to walk out except that the Spirit nudged my heart and gut long before I had head knowledge of Colonialism and Slavery and its impact.
I also remember my mom sitting me down in High School and inviting my sister and me to watch Roots. I am SO grateful for my mom. This series, at an impressionable age, changed my worldview forever. I studied Psychology and Sociology in college in South Dakota and took a J-term class in Chicago called “Intro to the City.” We examined the impact of public housing, visited these neighborhoods, and heard speakers of businesses bring hope back to these neighborhoods. I spent the night in a shelter, and another exercise was voted “mom” in a group of 5 college students. We had to shop and eat on a minimum wage paycheck for a family of 5 for 3 days. All of this had a huge impact, but living it, even for a few days, was eye-opening.
I did not learn most of what I believe about colonialism from school. I didn’t even know what we had done to the Native Americans in North Dakota and what reservations were until I was long gone from that very state. My education was tragic in this way. But as my story began, I had a gut feeling that I was experiencing the world from a tiny worldview, and the television series ROOTs was my foundation. When I think of Colonialism, I think of conquering, destroying, and forced assimilation. My deeply held conviction on Slavery is that it is evil and has created generational sin and toxicity for white people and generational trauma for those of African descent. And that reparations are only a beginning to trying to right a ship gone so far off course; there has to be a deep repentance and a conscious effort to own what our ancestors did and be people of action and advocacy.
- How have the readings affirmed your beliefs and were challenged, and why?
Now that I have written my thoughts and beliefs, all I had to do was open Nigel Biggar’s book Colonialism: A Moral Reckoning, and I immediately felt affirmation by the chapters’ names. I used many of the exact words to describe my deeply held beliefs, words such as “Conquest,” assimilation, and destruction, which can be tied to “slavery, superiority, genocide, exploitation, and pervasive violence.”[1]
Immigration is a “hot topic,” especially in the USA’s last election (2 days ago at the writing of this blog). Biggar starts chapter 4 with the following quote: “Innocent motives and good intentions can still be vitiated by acts of injustice. While there is nothing wrong per se with emigrating in pursuit of a better life, that pursuit involves trampling over the rights of others. It would become wrong.”[2] I can appreciate what the author is saying by giving the benefit of the doubt by stating innocent motives and good intentions, and perhaps this is true in some cases. Still, the lack of transparency and owning of when even these innocent and good intentions have been twisted and manipulated for evil has now negated the innocence and good. We all must take stock and own when our intentions meant for good were used for evil. Ego seems to take hold over and over again like a cancer, and cultures of privilege turn a blind eye over and over again. The cycle of oppression, violence, and “conquest” occurs over and over again. When we have a president-elect who can stand and publicly say words like “those rapists and criminals” to describe an entire group of people, we have chosen to turn a blind eye because we know our intentions are good, and he didn’t mean “all” of them. This is a big, enormous, gigantic, wicked problem, and perhaps the only solution we have is to set Big, Hairy, Audacious goals to defeat it, even when those around us don’t want to address our conquering the conquered mentality. It is just backward.
I didn’t find anything that challenged my beliefs in either book on an inspectional level, except maybe something I read in the “Legacies and Conclusions” [3]. My challenged belief is that I thought we had come a long way since the 1950s and the civil rights era. In many ways, we have had an African American president, but this chapter begins with a quote by President Harry Truman that shakes this belief. “I have had hardly a day in office that has not been dominated by this all-embracing struggle–this conflict between those who love freedom and those who would lead the world back into slavery and darkness.” This quote hits me hard in my gut today. This struggle for freedom and the right of all US citizens to pursue life, liberty, and happiness and that all men (and women) are created equal. This quote may become my prayer for our new president. I pray there is not a day he has in office that isn’t dominated by the all-embracing struggle between those who love freedom and be convicted by actions and policies he and his office may pass that will lead the world back into slavery and darkness. I believe Love wins. End of the story, but we cannot end the conversation there. WE MUST SPEAK UP, SHOW UP, AND WALK ALONG THOSE WITH WHOM POLICY AND RHETORIC DESTROY AND SEND INTO DARKNESS. BE THE LIGHT!
[1] Biggar, Nigel. Colonialism: A Moral Reckoning (London, HarperCollins, 2023), table of contents.
[2] Biggar, Nigel, (pg 98).
[3] Black, Jeremy. Slavery: A New Global History (London, Constable & Robinson, 2011), pg 246.
About the Author
Jana Dluehosh
Jana serves as a Spiritual Care Supervisor for Signature Hospice in Portland, OR. She chairs the corporate Diversity, Equity, Inclusion and Belonging committee as well as presents and consults with chronically ill patients on addressing Quality of Life versus and alongside Medical treatment. She has trained as a World Religions and Enneagram Spiritual Director through an Anam Cara apprenticeship through the Sacred Art of Living center in Bend, OR. Jana utilizes a Celtic Spirituality approach toward life as a way to find common ground with diverse populations and faith traditions. She has mentored nursing students for several years at the University of Portland in a class called Theological Perspectives on Suffering and Death, and has taught in the Graduate Counseling program at Portland Seminary in the Trauma Certificate program on Grief.4 responses to “The All Embracing Struggle”
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Hi, Jana,
Thank you for sharing so honestly from your story. As you described your journey, I could see how the Lord allowed both good and bad perceptions to shape and form you. I appreciate you ending with the hope of what love can accomplish. It is not time to be uninvolved but rather tenacious and consistent with our prayers on many levels as well as our involvement.
Last week, before the elections, my husband had our church break into groups to pray for the elections. He asked that each group pray for both candidates out loud in their groups. We have both sides of the aisle in our congregation. As our prayer groups began, I heard someone near me mutter under their breath, “this is going to be hard.” However, it truly lessened the tension and once again focused us all on who was truly in ultimate control. Prayer disarms as well as empowers.
Thanks again for your insightful post.
Thanks Esther,
What a courageous act to pray together and what courageous honesty to hear someone mumble “this is going to be hard”. It is going to be hard, for me personally, to pray for such a man. If I’m honest, it may take me a while to do so, I find it easier to pray for those marginalized for myself to have courage to stand up and
Good post. What a time to be discussing these questions and issues. I’m sure you’ve heard how African Americans are receiving text messages about slavery since the election results have come in. What complicates this whole ordeal are the people in the same party who are furious about these text messages and would fight to have it stopped. Being in the South, I have several close friends who would be in this category. The line of good and evil truly runs through every human heart, not just political or religious lines. Thanks for sharing your story and for validating just how wicked of a problem this really is.
Like you, I also believe that love wins. I just can’t shout it from the roof top right now…I am hurting. I also know that more than ever this is true, “I have had hardly a day in office that has not been dominated by this all-embracing struggle–this conflict between those who love freedom and those who would lead the world back into slavery and darkness.” I feel the second half of this passage deeply.