Joy to the World
RARE; how one may describe good leadership today. It is definitely implied by authors Marcus Warner and Jim Wilder in their book Rare Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits For Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead. Wilder, who holds a Ph.D. in Psychology and an M.A. in theology, and Warner, who holds a D.Min, bring their education and experience to bear in this leadership book. Utilizing brain science, the dynamics of emotional intelligence and maturity, and theology, the authors offer the leader the why and how to nurture healthy leadership teams wherever one finds themselves.
Rare Leadership is broken into 2 sections; section 1, Understanding Fast-Track Leadership, presents their thesis on what can shape leadership that is rare and section 2, Building RARE Leadership unpacks how to practice R.A.R.E. leadership. The foundation of Rare Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits For Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead, is the 4 habits Warner and Wilder organize in the acronym R.A.R.E. [1]
- R – “Remain Relational” – leaders must keep relationships more important than problems
- A – “Act Like Yourself” – leaders ought to have consistency of character.
- R – “Return to Joy” – leaders quickly return to joy from upsetting feelings and guide people to do the same.
- E – “Endure Hardship Well” – leaders navigate times they suffer well and aren’t afraid of hardship.
Wilder and Warner argue that with R.A.R.E. habits securely practiced, the leader will have the capacity to lead from a place that builds trust rather than through fear.
Reflecting on the concepts in Rare Leadership, I noticed a number of connections to our past readings. First is Mining for Gold where there is a similar call to investing in relationships. Although not an exact match, the authors use of Fast-Track process/Slow-Track process embodies Kahnman’s “system 1 and 2 thinking”. I find the “E” of rare resonates with Taleb’s Antifragile argument as well as Poole’s concept of engaging in simulation [2] in Leadersmithing. Poole’s chapter 3 also can speak into “A” of Rare Leadership. Tempered Resillience came to mind when comparing Bolsinger’s “Holding” and “Hammering” [3] with Wilder and Warners’ “R-Relational” and “E”. And there is the obvious connection with Friedman around the importance of self-differentiation and holding the tension of individualism and togetherness with healthy boundaries [4].
It is the “R-returning to Joy” that has captured my inquisitiveness. I found myself delving back into The Molecule of More because I want to understand more about the dynamics between dopamine and joy. Lieberman and Long have many references to happiness in their book. And there is clearly a connection between higher dopamine levels and how happy one is. There also seems to be a connection to how dopamine feeds the fast-track process; our instincts for happiness are hyped up on dopamine. But I pause to consider if Joy really is instinctive? When at our Advance in South Africa, I asked Jason the question about the difference between happiness and joy. Jason said, “Joy is psychological, and happiness is circumstantial.” What are the connections between our psychological selves and the work of dopamine? Because we are instructed in scripture to be joyful does that not imply we have to be intentional which takes more slow-track process/slow-thinking? In the midst of understanding joy, I also believe that there is a correlation between it and playfulness. Friedman comments that if a system has lost its playfulness, it is clearly paralyzed by anxiety.[5] I do agree with Wilder and Warner that joy requires a level of trust[6]. Trust maybe instinctual but it takes effort to move into joy.
All of this brings me back to ponderings when we read The Molecule of More;
how do I not only lead with playfulness but engender a space where the system is cognizant of the importance of play in the faith community? How do create space to invite the release of healthy dopamine levels to nurture the desire for play? How do I hold in tension the value of play with the cost of letting go of some certainty that faith our biases define?
Being a RARE leader who synthesizes my questions above and the other connections from our past books will require tenacity, vulnerability, resiliency, strength, and a whole lot of trust in the One who calls me to bring Joy to the world.
[1] Warner, Marcus, and Jim Wilder. Rare Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits For Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead. Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2016. Page 25.
[2] Poole, Eve. Leadersmithing: Revealing the Trade Secrets of Leadership. London ; New York, NY: Bloomsbury Business, 2017. Page 11. Kindle
[3] Bolsinger, Tod. Tempered Resilience: How Leaders Are Formed in the Crucible of Change. Downers Grove, IL: IVP, 2020. Chapters 5-6.
[4] Friedman, Edwin H., and Peter Steinke. A Failure of Nerve, Revised Edition: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix. 10th Anniversary edition. New York: Church Publishing, 2017. Page 63.
[5] Ibid. Pages 70-71.
[6] Warner, Marcus, and Jim Wilder. Rare Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits For Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead. Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2016. Page 67. Kindle
About the Author
Nicole Richardson
PC(USA) pastor serving a church in Kansas City. In my spare time I teach yoga and scuba diving14 responses to “Joy to the World”
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Nicole,
What a great analytical summary of the book.
I wonder how their insight into relational leadership, knowing its effects on individuals’ dopamine-induced brains, influences how you lead and pastor.
Andy, I have no idea. I think wisdom requires a balance in dopamine and H&N’s as we do the hard work of relationships. Humans are messy and so relationship development is a challenge in the midst of emotions, biases, hormones….let alone just trying to engage in the midst of great anxiety and cultural presuppositions
Nicole, I really enjoyed reading this post. I was also drawn to the presentation and dynamics of joy found in this book. I remember wondering if dopamine connected to joy in some way, so thanks for writing that out in such an insightful way. Do you think there is a way for senior leaders in the church to create environments that facilitate joy? If so, how does that help the psychological part of humanity versus creating merely circumstantial experiences that give momentary happiness?
Roy this is an interesting question. Joy seems like an elusive experience. Can we facilitate it? Scripture cajoles us to find joy in all circumstances. I guess the best way leaders can create environments is to be extremely mindful of building trust. But I am still a little sideways with the idea we build trust only because I don’t know that is how God functions with us…..God offers trust without us having to earn it. What does this mean for humans? How do we do that? I think trust is more instinctual and then joy is experienced in those relationships. I am just rambling…..I have no idea….lol
Nicole, *clap emoji X3* I’ll be returning to your post when we get to the synoptical essay… You obviously play with scuba and yoga. What overlaps exist with your ministry context and these forms of play?
Michael, For me the biggest hurdle is planting seeds of playfulness and humor in the community. So many put on their serious brain….church and worship is not reverent if it’s not serious. This all is couched in language of “I’m a traditionalist”. My head wants to explode every single time I hear this. The church is stuck in anxiety and won’t come out to play.
Nicole: You made some insightful ties with many other books we’ve read in this program. After almost three years o f reading books with Jason, we can start to draw a lot of similarities, especially it seems with leadership. But “The Molecule of More” hadn’t occurred to me. The older I get the more I find myself worrying about happiness; it comes naturally as a by-product when I work hard, learn, contribute and take care of all my responsibilities. We are the same age…you know I mean?
Troy yes I believe we are the same age. What are the distinct differences for you between happiness and Joy?
Great note on the connections to past reads. I found the emphasis to be contrary to Kahneman. Did you?
🙂
I did. But I am not convinced they are working from the same paint by numbers on the subject of fast and slow.
Nicole: Love the connections to our prior readings that you drew from. I’m wondering if you agree with their definition of joy being “the life-giving feeling of mutual care” – if not, what would you define it as? (pg. 212)
Kayli, I am not sure what my response is to your question. Because I am not sure what they really mean. Often joy for me has often been accompanied by tears. The phrase, “the life-giving feeling of mutual care” is not something that I can place in context to an experience. Joy is at-one-ment….it’s ….well…melding…..I guess I do not have the words.
Nicole.
Great job connecting with past readings. I love how you parked on the concept of joy. The authors say that joy stems from our connection to our true selves in God. Brene Brown would say joy is the by-product of gratitude. How would you say Friedman would define joy?
Friedman would park joy in the parking lot of freedom from anxiety!