It’s a Process
Rare Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits for Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead is a leadership book that incorporates elements of neuroscience and psychology. Written by Jim Wilder and Marcus Warner, the combined duo provide a breadth of experience to speak to the spiritual, mental, and social elements of leadership. Dr. Wilder has a PhD in clinical psychology and an MA in Theology. He is a well-known author and counselor and serves as the chief neurotheologian at Life Model Works, a nonprofit focusing on the intersection of the brain and science. Dr. Warner has served as a pastor, professor, author, and serves as the President of Deeper Walk International.
Written as a two-part book, Section 1 provides a baseline of understanding for the book’s thesis, while Section 2 serves as a ‘how to’ for applying the principles. According to Dr. Finzel, the book’s thesis is RARE leadership “is the fruit of four uncommon habits related to emotional intelligence.”[1] It is the authors’ hope that the book will provide an understanding of the fast-track brain and use gained skills to help train effective leaders using these four habits.[2] The habits are:
- R – Remain Relational. Far too often leaders tend to be problem-focused instead of people-focused.
- A – Act Like Yourself. “Rare leaders have a consistency of character anchored in a positive core identity that lets people know that whatever emotions I may face, I still know how to act like myself.”[3]
- R – Return to Joy. The authors emphasize the importance of a leader’s ability “to return to joy from a variety of negative emotions.”[4]
- E – Endure Hardship. Leaders embrace and do not avoid suffering.
For healthy leaders who demonstrate RARE, they model a sense of belonging (Remain Relational), have a healthy sense of identity (Act Like Yourself), model being glad to be together (Return to Joy), and see difficult times as opportunities to grow closer (Endure Hardship).[5]
The authors argue that the fast track must be used to process relational leadership skills instead of the slow track. Thinking of Kahnman’s Thinking, Fast and Slow, I am reminded of the two systems he proposes:
- “System 1 operates automatically and quickly, with little or no effect and no sense of voluntary control.
- System 2 allocates attention to the effortful mental activities that demand it, including complex computations.”[6]
As I was reading, it was my impression that Warner and Wilder place too great an emphasis on the fast track, or using Kahneman’s terminology, System 1. While I agree that we need fast track leading, it seems to me that there should be a greater balance between the two. Now, it is worth noting that as a hard charging 8 in the Enneagram, I am all about System 1, but I also see the unintentional consequences when I don’t take the time to s l o w d o w n.
There were some interesting concepts in the book, such as the emphasis on identity. In my research on leadership development, I concur that self-awareness and a clear sense of identity are crucial for a leader’s life. If this is lacking in a leader, then not only will they fail in developing others to mobilize the team toward the goal, but there is also a greater chance of burnout among the leader, staff, and creating a culture of toxicity. The authors speak to the need to emphasize relationships and that leaders don’t need “accountability groups” as that only furthers the performance metric and a false sense of identity. Instead, leaders (or anyone for that matter) should participate in what they call Identity Groups to help remind and affirm “who we are in Christ.”[7]
I also found the “levels of the brain” fascinating to understanding who we are, our role as leaders, and our call to help people align more closely with their Imago Dei. The four levels are as follows:
- Level One: The Attachment Center. It is all about relationships!
- Level Two: The Assessment Center. Fight or flight!
- Level Three: The Attunement Center. This is the part of the brain that reads people and identifies with their feelings.
- Level 4: The Identity Center. This is the highest level of brain function.[8]
According to the authors, we all experience Levels 1 and 2, but Level 3 is not fully complete pre-development and Level 4 is yet to be built.[9] This is a fascinating observation regarding the interplay of neurological growth and the development of the Self. While I cannot speak to the neurological accuracy of this concept, in thinking about the pathway of leadership development and sanctification, I can certainly conceptualize this theory and believe it demonstrates the importance of healthy leaders and leaders who are investing in others to become their best version in Christ.
Finally, I will quickly observe that I was particularly struck by the section titled “Signs You Have Shut Down Relationally.” The authors list six questions on page 129 that gave me pause as I reflected on times I have felt burnt out, even as of late. I see in myself a tendency to isolate from “relationships” and endure difficult realities on my own. This is a theme I have become acutely aware of in the past year of my marriage. It is my hope to address this head-on and, Lord willing, by His grace, and combat the temptation to rely on myself as I recall my true identify and lean heavily into the God-given community He has entrusted to me.
[1] Marcus Warner and E. James Wilder, Rare Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits for Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead (Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2016), 8.
[2] Ibid., 19.
[3] Ibid., 25.
[4] Ibid., 26.
[5] Ibid., 46.
[6] Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow, 1st pbk. ed. (New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2013), 20–21.
[7] Warner and Wilder, Rare Leadership, 53.
[8] Ibid., 66–68.
[9] Ibid., 69.
10 responses to “It’s a Process”
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Eric,
What an insightful review of the book. Thank you for adding the personal reflection at the end. I found this statement to be powerful, “It is my hope to address this head-on and, Lord willing, by His grace, and combat the temptation to rely on myself as I recall my true identify and lean heavily into the God-given community He has entrusted to me.”
Do you think that this is a theology you have inherited or all of us for that matter? The church is an institution, a place, instead of koinonia, a fellowship of Jesus’ followers. This is not an assumption, but how might you lean into your local church as an essential community of your faith journey beyond Sundays?
Good question. Certainly, “church” is not a building, right? In light of that, there is, in my opinion, a call to gather and this has importance, however, I would argue that this community is to go beyond our fathering for a couple of hours on a Sunday. Lean into deeper relationships, do life with people, etc. Be intentional. Personally, this is where “proximity” in relationships can make a big impact.
Eric, great summary and distilling of the key concepts from this week’s book. Thanks also for sharing part of your personal journey as it relates to relationships. I do have a question based on this quote: “…in thinking about the pathway of leadership development and sanctification, I can certainly conceptualize this theory and believe it demonstrates the importance of healthy leaders and leaders who are investing in others to become their best version in Christ.” Can you say more about the connection between leadership development and sanctification? Do you see that as one journey or is growth in each area unique?
Good question. One, I tend to believe that ‘leadership’ is a calling, thus, not for everyone per se. So while I do see sanctification as a process for all believers, I don’t necessarily believe it has to be connected to leadership. However, one might argue that by the very nature of living out our identity in Christ, we are leading in that we are influencing and modeling others.
Dr. Basye: I also liked their emphasis on levels of the brain. I always think it is worthwhile to develop areas where natural science and modern understanding of our physiology provides insight into spiritual truths. It is faith affirming to me. It reminded me of “The Body Keeps the Score” book we read earlier.
Yes, I read that your post. I totally agree. I appreciate bringing in the psychology component to it as it address the “whole” of a person.
Hey Eric! Excellent summary of Warner/Wilder’s book. Thank you! I gained some new insights about their book from reading your post :). And thank you for vulnerably sharing your own application of their work…may God’s grace sustain you on your journey deeper into relationship. You wrote: “I also found the “levels of the brain” fascinating to understanding who we are, our role as leaders, and our call to help people align more closely with their Imago Dei.” I’d value hearing more about how understanding the levels of the brain will help you as a leader to help others more closely align with their Imago Dei. In what way will this insight change, enhance, or add to your leadership practices?
As to the brain and leaders, I can’t help but think of The Molecule or More. It seems that there are some real connections here to how we are wired (and gifted). This concept, that leadership involves the whole of a person, is an insightful principle to me and has shaped: 1) the way I think as a leader: 2) the way I perceive others, and engage them; and 3) the way I would go about “leadership development” among different types of people, make-ups, and giftings.
Eric: Thanks for your vulnerability in relation to the book this week. I find it interesting that our ‘cure’ for burnout from work/ministry tends to be isolation through being away, taking a break, etc. Do you think there is a role of community in restoring someone from burnout? Could part of that community include those who are under the persons leadership? More pondering than anything…
Andy I too appreciate your summary and vulnerability.
You lifted up W/W argument on creating identity groups vs accountability groups. If you were to compare and contrast these two types of groups with your own experience and wisdom vs what W/W offer what would those be?