Identity Capital
“It’s not what we see that should upset us, but the large things we cannot see that should concern us.”[1] These words were spoken by Dr. Martyn Percy during his first few minutes with us at Oxford University on Saturday morning. As I wrote these words in my journal, a forgotten memory slowly emerged. Just a few minutes later he reiterated his point by saying that what’s underneath the surface is what we need to deal with and that the symptoms are representative of something much deeper. Then came the question that helped me name the memory and see it for what it was: The time in my ministry when I was confused by what was driving a sub- culture in which I worked. As Martyn Percy asked, “What’s below the surface that no one addresses anymore?”
This week’s reading helped me think with more clarity and humility about these questions. As a Christian author and speaker who spent more than 20 years ministering around the country to women’s groups between 1998-2019, I witnessed first hand the confusion over identity arising as a condition of living in the modern world. As author Francis Fukuyama writes in, Identity: The Demand for Dignity and the Politics of Resentment, “Modernization means constant change and disruption, and the opening up of choices that did not exist before.”[2] He explains how the freedom and degree of choice can leave people unhappy and disconnected from others. And that’s precisely how I found a generation of women whom I served: their authentic identities seeking to attach themselves to others. As I spoke individually with women between sessions, I heard how they were being seduced by other leaders and how they had been betrayed/disrespected by power structures, causing them to want to leave the Church or their Christian faith. I didn’t feel the need to deny these younger women’s lived experiences, I just couldn’t identify with how isolated they were becoming and I deeply desired to help steer them back to feeling a [mutually] respected dignity.[3]
The symptoms I witnessed were younger women less engaged with the topics presented, coming to wrong conclusions, and very little relationship with other generations. As Dr. Percy points out that it’s not what we see that should upset us, but what’s underneath[4]: I discovered a culture of young, professional Christian women who felt invisible. At that point in time, I’d never heard the term Identity Politics; yet, that’s what I was witnessing. I find Fukuyama’s thoughts comforting: “There is nothing wrong with identity politics as such; it is a natural and inevitable response to injustice.”[5] The problem I had was I still couldn’t identify what was causing the young women to feel invisible. (I did ask them what would help them feel recognized.[6])
From Identity to Identities
Fukuyama’s chapter 11 seems pivotal to the question of what’s driving our culture when he wrote about the new social movements that appeared in the 1960s, “Each movement represented people who had up to then been invisible and suppressed; each resented that invisibility and wanted public recognition of their inner worth.”[7] It’s in this chapter that I find my questions both named and addressed. Of course we want to know what’s beneath the surface when any group is showing signs of detachment, isolation, resentment, anger. However, there does come a point when identity politics becomes problematic, “When identity is interpreted or asserted in certain specific ways . . .a cheap substitute for serious thinking. . .”[8]
Perhaps finding cheap substitutes for serious thinking is a concern for the generations behind us? Might that be what’s happening beneath the surface? A lack of serious thinking? Coming to wrong conclusions?
Identity Capital
In 2012, Dr. Meg Jay wrote, The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter-and how to make the Most of them Now. One of her chapters is called Identity Capital. Identity capital is our collection of personal assets and the repertoire of individual resources that we assemble over time. Jay writes, “There are investments we make in ourselves, the things we do well enough, or long enough, that they become a part of who we are.”[9] Jay asserts that identity capital is what Twentysomethings bring to the adult marketplace as they build themselves over time. Her research looks at how people resolve identity crises by working hard and exploring relationships yet warns against spending too much time in “disengaged confusion” which could lead to becoming irrelevant. What makes her argument and book sustainable for the long haul are her compassion and practical advice. Dr. Jay provides tools or rules necessary to make the most out of your twenties by showing how work, relationships, personality and even identity can change if the time is used wisely.
It seems Fukuyama’s work on identity politics and Walker’s work with fluidity in leadership[10] offer similar solutions: for a democracy or an organization to work we must agree on basic rules, tools and shared values that define larger and more integrative national identities.
A Remedy For our Identity Crisis
How might we be tasked with helping to identify basic rules or tools or shared values as leaders? Do we even want the responsibility surrounding identity politics?
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Later on Saturday morning, Dr. Martyn Percy spoke in a bit softer tone, “Obligation is something that cannot be forced but must be done–leadership is a heavy cargo of obligation, care, safety, well being, hope and imagination. . .If you lift the heavy cargo, you lift everyone else up. If you do, you do the work of God.”[11]
[1] Dr. Martin Percy
[2] “Identity : The Demand for Dignity and the Politics of Resentment –
[3] In response to these conversations, I organized a gathering of 40 women ranging in ages 21-78 who discussed the breakdown of relationships across generations which culminated in my book, A Friend in Me: How to be a Safe Haven for Other Women. Ironically, I had thought I was writing a book on connecting with God. These discussions steered me toward helping the young women have a voice about how they felt when they entered Christian spaces.
[4] Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow. This is the same concept as what you see isn’t all there is.
[5] “Identity : The Demand for Dignity and the Politics of Resentment – George Fox University. P. 115
[6] Several women commented on other women’s body language when they were in conversation.
[7] “Identity : The Demand for Dignity and the Politics of Resentment – George Fox University. p. 107.
[8] p.115
[9] Jay, “The Defining Decade.”
[10] “Leading with Nothing to Lose (Undefended Leader): Walker, Simon P.:
[11] Dr. Martin Percy
About the Author
Pam Lau
Pamela Havey Lau brings more than 25 years of experience in speaking, teaching, writing and mediating. She has led a variety of groups, both small and large, in seminars, trainings, conferences and teachings. Pam’s passion is to see each person communicate with their most authentic voice with a transparent faith in Jesus Christ. With more than 10, 000 hours of writing, researching, and teaching the heart and soul of Pam’s calling comes from decades of walking alongside those who have experienced healing through pain and peace through conflict. As a professor and author, Pam deeply understands the role of mentoring and building bridges from one generation to another. She has developed a wisdom in how to connect leaders with their teams. Her skill in facilitating conversations extends across differences in families, businesses, schools, universities, and nonprofits. Pam specializes in simplifying complex issues and as a business owner, has helped numerous CEOs and leaders communicate effectively. She is the author of Soul Strength (Random House) and A Friend in Me (David C. Cook) and is a frequent contributor to online and print publications. You can hear Pam’s podcast on Real Life with Pamela Lau on itunes. Currently, Pam is a mediator for families, churches, and nonprofits. You can contact Pam through her website: PamelaLau.com. Brad and Pam live in Newberg, Oregon; they have three adult daughters and one son-in-law. One small, vocal dog, Cali lives in the family home where she tries to be the boss! As a family they enjoy worshiping God, tennis, good food and spending time with family and friends.17 responses to “Identity Capital”
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Hi Pam,
I am so grateful that you caught all of Dr. Percy’s deeply personal quote, “Obligation is something that cannot be forced but must be done–leadership is a heavy cargo of obligation, care, safety, well being, hope and imagination. . .If you lift the heavy cargo, you lift everyone else up. If you do, you do the work of God.” This quote anchors some of my harder experiences in ministry. I am returning to a place in a few days in which the cargo of obligation and service was very heavy. I feel the invitation to grieve, perhaps a bit more than I had space to years ago. I am reminded of how precious the work of God is and how tender God is with those who take on the task of completing it. Thank you!
Jenny~
Isn’t it interesting and even ironic how God orchestrated your steps to take a trip back to a “hard” place soon after you started a doctorate in global leadership? It seems those places are often where God does His best redemptive work–you have new eyes to see your surroundings. I am praying for all your “selves” who served as a missionary. Your project will only be the richer!
Well written post, Pam. You highlighted the tension that we see in regard to choices. You said, “Freedom and degree of choice can leave people unhappy and disconnected from others.” This seems like a spectrum where either extreme is problematic. When people live with no choices we call that tyranny. But too many choices can be paralyzing (hello, cereal aisle at the grocery store). I suppose one function of a leader is to offer enough choices while still maintaining enough limits to keep our people moving forward. How do you see that playing out in your own leadership or maybe in the lives of other leaders around you?
Kim,
Nice job noticing the contrast between too many choices and no choices at all! It’s kind of like bad parenting, right? The parents who give their children no choices create rebellion just as the parent who offer too many choices create rebellion in a different way. But to answer your question I find it more helpful to recognize the leaders around me. Currently, I am working with two executive leaders who are in a two-year long conflict. One directly supervises the other. What directly impacts this relationship is one of the leaders operates with boundaries, rules of life, while the other leader has no problem with taking advantage of her seniority and bulldozes over others by not following any rules or respecting others’ boundaries. I realize this isn’t the best example of what we are talking about but doesn’t the ability to make choices start with our highest level leaders? The irony of this particular situation is that the subordinate leader wants his superior to help him reduce stress by having less choices. Whereas the the executive in charge won’t help with choices–she just wants the leader to rely completely on her. Why is it that we don’t want people to have the right kind of freedom?
Thanks for quoting this…”“Obligation is something that cannot be forced but must be done–leadership is a heavy cargo of obligation, care, safety, well being, hope and imagination. . .If you lift the heavy cargo, you lift everyone else up. If you do, you do the work of God.” Wow, brilliant.
I cannot go a day without thinking of the “war time footing/leadership” that our church leaders will have to prepare for in the dialogue/debate on the Ukrainian War/Israeli …more to come?
Kim Sanford mentioned that she was from a Mennonite background and was wrestling with Simon Walker’s comment on Holy Violence.
Krissy (third year) asked is it our time to be martyred for our faith?
Wow.
Shalom…
Russell~
What do you believe is our moral responsibility in these situations? What choices should we be making? And if you could advise pastors in the coming days, what would you tell them?
Hi Pam,
During Desert Storm 1 and 2, I remember Pastors wrestling with the Just War concept. Augustine set the standard for dialogue and debate. Pastors who have had the benefit of a peace time period should look at these thoughts and perhaps peek at Dietrich Bonheoffer (WWII).
While I believe that the violence in Israel will breed more violence, I have begun to mentally separate Hamas Militia from Palestinian. Especially those women and children who hover around the Rafa border crossing between Gaza and Egypt. The Egyptians have closed the crossing.
Food, water, medicines for these folk is a need. Spiritual guidance thrown in also a plus (though at this point felt needs will outweigh spiritual ones).
Fukuyama speaks to identities that are shaped by shared trauma. Wow, Ukrainians and now Palestinians can certainly attest to that!
No profound answers, no profound resolutions – love as He loved.
As for the Hamas Militia – Holy Violence.
Shalom…
Russell~ Were you surprised by Simon Walker’s startling statement about the next war? Do you believe it’s inevitable? I know this is out of context here; however, if we apply this question to this week’s reading’s theme of a need to be recognized and seen–it seems we must fight for all children and parents and their basic needs no matter what “side” they are on?!
I wasn’t surprise by Walker’s comments. I actually sympathize with it. In the face of evil, we can fight or die. Bonhoeffer was killed for his faith (martyrdom is also a sad alternative-self emptying).
I have little faith in the men/organizations that seek power. They will not be washed away until the 2nd coming. “Wars and rumors of wars” are at our doorstep.
So instead, I work with orphanages (8) in Hungary and now with a Christian Soccer League in Ukraine called Penuel. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4MhVivdo7Y
I can have an impact there.
Shalom…
If I recall correctly (and I’m not totally sure I am), wasn’t it Will Foster that addressed leadership with the “glacier” analogy of what is above and below the surface?
Dr. Percy’s quote “It’s not what we see that should upset us, but the large things we cannot see that should concern us” connects to that nicely.
How often to we (the collective we) only see what is above the waterline – our focus is just on what we see, and not on “large things we cannot see.” These are the things that should concern us. Things like human dignity, equality, respect, love and humility.
John, Your comments are reminding me of when we read The Failure of Nerve by Edwin Friendman when he wrote about the long, slow fix of character and integrity. He said the symptoms to look for that indicates problems under surface are Over reactivity, Herd Mentality, Blame Shifting, Quick Fix Mentality, A lack of Character in a Driven Leader. You are right about Will Foster’s “glacier” analogy. Now I believe we are seeing what was beneath the surface! It’s daunting!
Pam, I appreciate the unique lens you have and the passion you bring to this topic. I certainly could identify with your comment: “I discovered a culture of young, professional Christian women who felt invisible.”
There is a connection to this reality facing so many in our communities and your last thought: “How might we be tasked with helping to identify… shared values as leaders?” I think part of our calling not just to help leaders identify their values, but to see the values (and worth) of those they are leading.
Thank you for the thoughtful post!
Jen~
Thanks for pointing out that you can identify what I discovered back in 2014 when I was researching for my book. Would you say that has changed for you as a professional, Christian woman? What about in the Church? Ironically, I just read an article in Common Good magazine about this very topic – how pastors of churches only see their female parishinors has Mothers or teachers in the church and one pastor was quoted, “Oh! I only see her keeping her toddlers in toe; I hadn’t considered what she did during the week.” On another note, I am still thinking about how leaders can live out the life of the one with value responsibility for those with whom they oversee. Would love to hear your thoughts.
Pam,
This is such an excellent post. You captured some of Dr. Percy’s comments that I missed. I appreciate that you were able to tie his comments with Fukuyama’s.
Thank you for reading the post, Jonita! Praying for your time away as you both are doing God’s work in listening to others.
Hi Pam! Thanks for your insightful post. I appreciate it!
I’m intrigued by your post. Your exposition regarding the endeavors of the women you supported in their pursuit of dignity and equality has been a true source of inspiration. It serves as tangible evidence that throughout history, oppressive, exploitative, and exclusionary practices have persistently recurred. Furthermore, when you juxtapose Fukuyama‘s perspectives with those of Percy’s, a close relationship between the two, ultimately culminating in the phrase, “If you do it, you are doing God’s work.” This leads to my subsequent inquiry: what presents the most significant inhibiting factor that must be vigilantly addressed in the context of doing God’s work? Thank you.
Dinka,
It’s my understanding that the most significant inhibiting factor that must be vigilantly addressed in the context of doing God’s work is to have one ear on the audience you serve and the other ear on the Holy Spirit. Leaders must listen.