I Took the Curtain Down
For the first few weeks of living in a village house along the coast of Kenya we did not have any curtains on our windows. We were like fish in a fishbowl with everyone looking in. Though we always had an audience watching us, not having curtains allowed for the breeze to provide a little relief in the unbearable heat and humidity. It didn’t take too long for our family to adjust to people watching us at our windows all day (and probably night). It was as if we were the new play in town and everyone wanted to come see what was on stage and then write their own reviews. In a sense, we were entertainment.
In this week’s reading, Simon Walker writes about leadership styles and personas. He compares the undefended versus the defended leader. In making the comparison he uses the terminology of a stage, in which the audience only sees what is presented on the frontstage, but they can’t see what is backstage. Another interesting point of his book is the different leadership Ego’s which I am going to put aside at this moment. Instead, I want to focus on the drama of the stage.
As leaders, we perform on stage, portraying to the audience the best view of ourselves from frontstage. We try to minimize the clutter in the backstage. Walker writes, “Each of us develops a routine that we perform every day and tries to get the attention of the audience we want, who will give us the kind of reception we seek, affirming our sense of identity.”[1] This continues as we go about our work because as Walker lectured, “The audience requires our performance. So therefore, we perform.”[2]
Some questions come to mind. Who are we performing for? What about the backstage? Is it truly possible to divide the stage, front and back?
In a theology book called Faith Speaking Understanding by Kevin Vanhoozer he uses a theatrical model to help the Christian learn his place in the cosmic script. “The theatrical model encourages us to think of the triune God as simultaneously playwright, actor, and director of the drama of human history.”[3] Furthermore he adds, “The ultimate goal of the actor is not simply to play a role but to project the main idea of the play.”[4] Well, the play is not ours. We are not the scriptwriters nor are we the director. We are simply a part of the cosmic drama that God himself has written. This limits my role while standing on frontstage.
My role is to point to Jesus as the one to get the adoration of the audience. It seems that my role as an undefended leader isn’t to worry about my stage presence but rather to invite others to participate in the play with me. The stage is not meant to be lonely but rather it is more like community theatre, inviting others to play the roles God has for them. Obviously, this might allow fellow actors to wonder around back-stage but Walker writes, “The secret of effective leadership is the freedom to live the undefended life.”[5]
Vanhoozer and Walker both articulate theatrical roles. Vanhoozer encourages the Christian to participate fully in the drama of God and Walker encourages the leader to embrace “our full humanity, discovering what it is to be fully human, to participate fully in the world.”[6] For Vanhoozer, our participation in the drama is how we become fully human.
When we lived in a fishbowl, we learned there is no distinction between the frontstage and the backstage when people can peer into your windows and see everything. I began learning how to live my life on a bigger stage where I am truly performing for the only one who understands my performance, our Lord Jesus. The drama I am in always has room for others to step out of the audience and join me on stage. The Lord will give him his own role to perform. However, most audience members aren’t willing to step up onto the frontstage unless they have peered into the backstage.
Therefore, I took the curtain down and try to live my life as honest and open as possible in an undefended way.
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[1] Simon Walker, Leading Out of Who You Are, The Undefended Leader Trilogy 1 (Carlisle, UK: Piquant Editions Ltd., 2007), 24.
[2] Simon Walker, “Leading Out of Who You Are” (Lecture, Oxford, September 25, 2023).
[3] Kevin J. Vanhoozer, Faith Speaking Understanding (Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press, 2014), 29.
[4] Vanhoozer, 119.
[5] Walker, 102.
[6] Walker, 154.
About the Author
Adam Cheney
I grew up in California, spent five years living along the beautiful coast of Kenya and now find myself working with refugees in the snow crusted tundra of Minnesota. My wife and I have seven children, four of whom have been adopted. I spend my time drinking lots of coffee, working in my garden, and baking sourdough bread.16 responses to “I Took the Curtain Down”
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Adam,
I really like Walker’s stage analogy, I think its something that we all understand. Many people seem to live a double life making sure they curtains they have hung are thick and do not sag in any way. As I told Glyn, I love the stories in the Bible because they show us the full stage, front and back, of the many saints. I am wondering do the Somalian refugees you are working with also seem to perform on a stage or have life events caused them to be more transparent?
Jeff,
That is a good question. I do not think I have really ever met a Muslim who does not have a significant backstage. There are many secrets. Recently, I was talking to a female who wore a full veil. She said she wears it simply for the anonymous aspect of nobody knowing who she is.
Adam, your focus on the front and backstage elements of Walker’s book is a strong reminder that the stage is God’s and we are part of the cast. My curiosity says how do you thing Jesus thinks of what happens backstage where He still can see what it going on.
Diane,
I imagine Jesus looks at the stuff we try to hide and laughs at us in a fatherly sort of way. Like, he sees through the frailty and ego we try to exhort.
Thanks for connecting these two authors together around this theme. How do we invite people up on stage to join us in the drama? Or is that the responsibility of Jesus?
Ryan,
I think our job is to do the invitation. It is the Holy Spirit’s job to compel them to lose their ego and be willing to come on stage.
In my opinion, one of the best ways to invite people on stage is for them to see as much of the stage as possible. Recently, one Muslim Afghan man and I were discussing our faith. He wanted to know everything about my finances and retirement. It was not because he needed to know how much money I made but rather to learn how followers of Jesus use and allocate money. He wanted to see the back stage and I let him.
Adam,
You reminded me of a time when we were living in downtown LA and a new hotel came in. One of their promotional “stunts” was to hire young models to live in a room that had no curtains on the ground floor. I didn’t understand the concept, but I can definitely see it as a plus for your context.
Since you already left the curtain down at your home in Kenya, are you able to do that at your office? And, if so, what would I see if I peered into your window? What characteristics would you want me to see and know that epitomizes who Adam is?
Nancy,
Actually, I don’t have any curtains on the main level of our house. We do for our bedrooms upstairs but I do still love openness. Though we don’t live in a location where people are still peering into our windows. I have always strived to be authentic. This doesn’t mean that everyone needs to see everything but I strive for authenticity among the variety of people I work with and meet. This includes my social media presence.
Adam, thanks for the blog.
What strategies do you employ to navigate the balance between presenting yourself on the “frontstage” as a leader while also allowing others to see into your “backstage”?
Glyn,
Good question. I try to bring other people along with me whenever possible. I jokingly mentioned to you in WhatsApp that I use the blog for the frontstage and WhatsApp for backstage. Which is partially true, but I wouldn’t care if those discussions made their way onto the front stage here on the blog. Even if they would color in the detail, they don’t need to be there.
We (you and I) grew up in the era of MySpace. My wife and I each had our own accounts and we both started to see the dichotomy of the front stage and back stage. So, when Facebook came (and stuck around way longer than expected) we decided to join our account so that we no longer had a front or back stage. This allows someone (my wife) to see the backstage of my social media presence.
Note that color is spelt without a U. You’re welcome.
Adam. This is rich! Thank you. I appreciate how you spoke of Jesus and his ability to see all. You seem to have a good front stage / back stage balance. In addition to using Jesus as the model, how else would you encourage others to maintain this balance?
Daren,
Good question. I’d say that we just need to begin to let our guards down. People are so afraid of doing anything wrong these days, but we are not all perfect. We really ought to stop trying. Instead, lets give more grace to each other, expect a little less of each other and admit our own shortcomings.
Adam, yours was the first blog I read to help me better understand the concepts of the book. I even shared your story with my husband in the car last night, but realized I forgot to comment.
I appreciate this statement that you made:
The stage is not meant to be lonely but rather it is more like community theatre, inviting others to play the roles God has for them.
Yours is a refreshing perspective, but how did your front stage and back stage personas play out when you lived in Africa? You were the minority and needed/wanted the community relationships. Still, you can’t win over everyone. What did that look like for you and Heather?
Jennifer,
It looked like being honest about who we were and what we were doing. I think this is one of the more challenging aspects for overseas workers. It also requires honesty in sharing with those who sent us. I have seen too many people dramatize simple stories for effect or try to capitalize off of other’s work. We just try to be upfront with everyone. For example, recently I was with a Somali friend. We were talking to a Christian friend from my church. The Christian friend asked about my NPO project. It was a moment where I could cater to one community or not. I chose to have a singular, honest answer that both communities might appreciate. This is what I strive for.
Adam, thank you for the great post. I appreciated the way you complimented Walker’s ideas with Vanhoozer. It seems you answered my question in a response to Nancy. I wanted to know if you now have curtains. I am curious, was it common for everyone in the village to not have curtains on their windows? The houses in Nouakchott are very private.
I know you have shared about the struggles your family faced in Kenya. What was it like to share your back stage with those in the U.S. when the very challenging things were happening? Did you feel defended or undefended? I find most of my front stage performance happens when I am reporting to people in the States. I have struggled with this balance my entire time overseas.
Elysse,
Sharing about our life overseas back in the US can be very challenging. I realized that people didn’t want to hear about the play or the drama. Instead, they only wanted to see the previews then be ushered back into their normal theatre where the play was much more comfortable for them to sit through. I stopped taking offense to that. It is hard for people to know what they don’t know. Honestly, it is a threshold concept that they just can’t seem to get over. So, I give them the frontstage preview because that is what they bought a ticket for. Nonetheless, the backstage is lit up, open to viewing but largely ignored.