How Can We Speak of These Things?
“Anyone who sets [themselves] up as “religious” by talking a good game is self-deceived. This kind of religion is hot air and only hot air. Real religion, the kind that passes muster before God the Father, is this: Reach out to the homeless and loveless in their plight, and guard against corruption from the godless world.” James 1:13-14, The Message
In 1928, Samuel Goldstein fled war torn Warsaw, Poland when he was a teenager. His poverty-stricken mother sent him and his sister, Jenny, on a boat to New York City, via Ellis Island. The plan was for them to earn enough money to come back and live in Poland again. Samuel worked endless hours as a tailor and model for men’s clothing and by 1932 married Ruth Butler, a Jewish woman whose family immigrated from Russia. By 1941, Sam owned his own tailor shop after years of working in Center City Philadelphia, eventually becoming the father of three young children. Once the second World War started, Samuel and Jenny never heard from their mother again. By 1944, Sam started showing signs of mental illness and was diagnosed with schizophrenia, which doctors linked to many Ashkenazi Jewish[1] people from his village in Warsaw. Placed in a mental institution with round the clock drugs, Samuel lived institutionalized until his death in 1989. Ruth placed all three of her young children in the Jewish Foster care system of Philadelphia; her youngest child, a daughter named Sandra, was 10 months old. Sandra was raised by a devout Jewish family for 12 years until Ruth decided she wanted her family back with her again–with living so many years apart, the family never fully recovered to full health.
Sandra Goldstein is my mother and even though she experienced a radical conversion to Christianity in her 20s, she suffered mentally and emotionally for most of her life because of the antisemitism her parents and grandparents suffered both in Europe, Russia and America. My Jewish relatives’s stories resonate deeply with, “The dislike of the unlike.” Though being a Jewish woman was a battle for her identity, my mother raised me to somehow transcend our race. For her, an identity in Christ was a far more powerful bond than an identity to her broken and battered Jewish roots. (When she converted to Christianity, her family shunned her telling her she was weak). From my mother forward, and to the generations after her, a relationship to Christ frames our identity more than our race.
Reading this week’s topic and book was sobering. Not only is antisemitism the “oldest racism in the world,” but as Kenan Malik reminds us, “‘racial prejudice’, the French philosopher and diplomat Alexis de Tocqueville noticed, seems to be stronger in those states which have abolished slavery than in those where slavery still exists and nowhere is it as intolerant as in those states where slavery has never been known.”[2] How can the way we talk about identity and race be different? What is our moral obligation as leaders to choose different experiences for ourselves and ultimately for our children’s children? What’s at the heart and soul of our motivation when we speak of these things?
At the crux of Kenan Malik’s book, Not so Black and White, is his keen observation that as a human race our motivation has been lost. Where we used to be universalists believing that change was possible,[3] we’ve now become performative in our anti-racism, fueled with malice, anger and pessimism. Here’s what’s helping me enter this divisive conversation as I recall Julian Treasure’s wisdom in How to Be Heard:[4]
- Listen, Know the History and Say What I Mean.
In this month’s edition of Christianity Today, Mike Cosper writes a piece on the troubling ideology that led to the horrors of October 7. He acknowledges that the stories people are telling one another do not reflect that Hamas’s slogan, “From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free,” as a free democratic state for all citizens. The term Judenrein–a Nazi term meaning “cleansed by Jews”[5] is the key to what they want–what’s at the heart of their motivation. Some may compare Hamas’ atrocities to right-wing Israeli extremists; however, Cosper points out that the vast majority of Israeli citizens celebrate the liberal nature of the state, equal rights and privileges of their Arab citizens.[6]
- Pay Attention to My Motivation for Speaking or Not Speaking Up.
Last week, Jonathan Kuttab, co-founder of Nonviolence International held an in-person forum explaining how across the world, a multitude of actions have been undertaken calling for a Palestine/Israel ceasefire, release of hostages/prisoners. Statements were made claiming that our country, “Directly implicated an active participation in this ongoing genocide.”[7] I watched as leaders I knew became uncomfortable with the inequality in the room. Yet, no one spoke up about how one side of this divisive war was being presented–even I remained silent. If I truly want to transcend race and break the bonds of identity politics, shouldn’t I be willing to, “resurrect radical universalism not as an idea but as a social movement,”[8] as Malik suggests? If there’s inequality, even in a high-pitched, divisive conversation–isn’t that a problem?
How Can We Speak of These Things?
It’s easy to focus on the division, on problems, on the loudest voices. As I’ve mentioned previously, my brother, Daniel Goldstein, is a citizen of Israel and flew to Oregon two days before the October 7th attacks leaving him unable to fly back to his home for two months. During those weeks together, he was able to give us insight into the decades upon decades of conflict and violence. Israel did not do everything right. Neither did Palestine. I’m still thinking about the stories he told about the Palestians who suffer in Gaza because of Hamas’ control. Just like we heard the stories of how our great grandparents, grandparents and mother suffered at the hands of antisemitism and hatred–we mourn for the Jewish people. In the same way, Hamas has spent decades telling the same story to their children and now our children. What was and still is their story? The Jewish State must be taken down by violence so we can have a Utopia. May God have mercy and may I speak up from my truest identity in a Risen Savior Who created all men and women equally. I believe change is still possible as I stand in the tension between these two equally loved people groups.
[1] Dwork, D. “Health Conditions of Immigrant Jews on the Lower East Side of New York: 1880-1914.” Medical History 25, no. 1 (January 1981): 1–40. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1138984/.
[2] Malik, Kenan. “Not So Black and White | Hurst Publishers.”
[3] What We Get Wrong About Race – Kenan Malik, 2023. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vajeuKADyc. In this podcast, Kenan Malik brings up the union strikes in the South throughout the 20th century and their importance to making change. The motivation behind the identity groups was to bring about change for the greater good. Malik articulates how we went from caring about the larger group to putting people in smaller boxes.
[4] Treasure, Julian. How to Be Heard: Secrets for Powerful Speaking and Listening. Mango Media, 2017.
[5] Cospter, Mike. “The Aftermath of Kearaza: The Troubling Ideology that Led to the Horrors of October 7.” Christianity Today. March 2024. p.35.
[6] P. 36.
[7] Nonviolence International. “Nonviolence International,” February 26, 2024. https://www.nonviolenceinternational.net/.
[8] Malik, (Chapter 4, “The Reinvention of Jew Hatred”). Read online without page numbers.
About the Author
Pam Lau
Pamela Havey Lau brings more than 25 years of experience in speaking, teaching, writing and mediating. She has led a variety of groups, both small and large, in seminars, trainings, conferences and teachings. Pam’s passion is to see each person communicate with their most authentic voice with a transparent faith in Jesus Christ. With more than 10, 000 hours of writing, researching, and teaching the heart and soul of Pam’s calling comes from decades of walking alongside those who have experienced healing through pain and peace through conflict. As a professor and author, Pam deeply understands the role of mentoring and building bridges from one generation to another. She has developed a wisdom in how to connect leaders with their teams. Her skill in facilitating conversations extends across differences in families, businesses, schools, universities, and nonprofits. Pam specializes in simplifying complex issues and as a business owner, has helped numerous CEOs and leaders communicate effectively. She is the author of Soul Strength (Random House) and A Friend in Me (David C. Cook) and is a frequent contributor to online and print publications. You can hear Pam’s podcast on Real Life with Pamela Lau on itunes. Currently, Pam is a mediator for families, churches, and nonprofits. You can contact Pam through her website: PamelaLau.com. Brad and Pam live in Newberg, Oregon; they have three adult daughters and one son-in-law. One small, vocal dog, Cali lives in the family home where she tries to be the boss! As a family they enjoy worshiping God, tennis, good food and spending time with family and friends.11 responses to “How Can We Speak of These Things?”
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Thank you for speaking of these things, Pam. I applaud your courage to connect the dots to your own family story.
I found that while I agreed with much of what Malik said, I felt he was urging a utopian answer that is beyond our grasp. It’s one thing to critically argue where racism came from and encourage his reader to start a revolution… but there didn’t seem to be a satisfactory answer to the problem or a starting point to combat it.
Maybe the starting point is to keep courageously telling our lived experiences and family stories. To critically think about why those realities exist. And to reach out in love to those who are telling different stories.
Thank you for reading my vulnerable post, Tim. So can you say a bit more about Malik offering a Utopian answer? I am very curious about your statement on answers to the problem.
Thank for including this one important (among many) phrases: “Israel did not do everything right. Neither did Palestine. I’m still thinking about the stories he told about the Palestians who suffer in Gaza because of Hamas’ control.”
If you read my post this week, you will see that I too focused heavily upon antisemitism, and that I overlooked a reference to the human value of the dear people of Palestine, whom have as you mentioned “suffered because of Hamas’ control.”
This is such as touchy issue – and always has been since the days of Isaac and Ishmael. Lord help us.
John, Before I head over to read your post, which sounds very interesting–how do you answer the people in your congregation who don’t have any context for the Israeli conflict? Also, have you every preached from the passages on Isaac and Ishmael? If so, does it give you any sense of what God would have the rest of us do?
Pam your family history resonates with history made relevant.
God’s Chose people have survived the test of time, with racist scars that SHOULD teach the rest of the world a lesson.
Sadly…For all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God.
I wonder…was the Tower of Babel the precursor TEST that God set into motion. Jenny Dooley turned it and said, maybe it was God setting up an opportunity for man to cross language/cultural/race borders.
I don’t know.
Some fun facts
1. Anti-Coolie Act (1862): Aimed at reducing the competition between Chinese laborers and white laborers by imposing a tax on Chinese workers.
2. Page Act of 1875: Considered one of the earliest immigration laws, it effectively prevented Chinese women from immigrating to the U.S. by classifying them as “undesirable,” targeting those suspected of prostitution or being brought for immoral purposes.
3. Chinese Exclusion Act (1882-1943): This act was the first and only major federal legislation to explicitly suspend immigration for a specific nationality, prohibiting all immigration of Chinese laborers for ten years, which was later extended.
Ending on a high note. My Identity in Christ has given me a world wide FAMILY to belong to. Amen.
Selah…
Russell~
Thank you for your thoughtful response. I didn’t know of the facts you mentioned above about Chinese women and laborers.
I am unsure how others interpret the term “God’s Chosen People” when it comes to present day Jewish people or Israel but I see it more as the Church. So to add to your great question, how might the Church learn about endurance and staying in the game from other oppressed people groups?
Hi Pam, one of the issues with our program is that while we dive deep into “white academia” I don’t think we give enough time to explore the leadership of Russia, China, Africa and those autocratic nations that may plunge us into war.
In specific, I think we would learn a lot from the churches that thrive and grow under persecution in these countries. I would imagine a focus on the survival basics of Christianity rather than carpet color and hymns versus “contemporary worship.”
Too cynical? Apologies.
Selah…
Russell~
You’re not being cynical at all! Have you mentioned this to others in the program? Now you have me very curious what that might look like and which authors we would read? Do you have any suggestions?
HI Pam,
I am thinking organically at first, I would think that Dinka might give us some advice on readings/books/pastors/organizations working in the Indonesian environment. Kim for French/Europe perspectives. Jenny Dooley for her Cambodia/Asian resources.
Overseas NGOs and bible schools (Calvary Chapel in Tiblisi, Georgia) probably have a library of cross cultural ministries that could contribute to a global perspective.
Russ
Hi Pam, Thank you for sharing your family story. Your mom sounds like an amazing woman, strong in her faith, vulnerable enough to share her story of pain, and courageous in creating a new chapter for her family. We need to listen to her stories. I agree that listening is a door that opens to the possibility of freedom for the speaker and the listener. Your love and respect for your mom shines through your post. You have a beautiful and kind voice. Where do you sense God inviting you to use it in this season?
Jenny~
Your question of, “Where do you sense God inviting you to use it in this season?” is my favorite question this semester! I have been spending time in prayer (longer than normal) asking God this question as my sense is that He and I are working on some important changes together. My first response is that I would like to take all my years of training college students to speak and teach the Church to talk to the culture, the academy, and it’s own people with some new skills. Not that I have all the answers; as I say over and over, I am a lead learner and I love to teach what I have learned. My second response is that I am an advocate so I can sense God using my voice on behalf of those who cannot speak up or choose not to. With each mediation (family law or leaders), I find that my voice confronts where there is fear, deceit or disrespect. Other times, my voice is a door for the appellant who everyone else ignores. I do hope to use my voice differently as a speaker once I am finished with the program. I am excited about the messages being born deep within. Thanks for asking the question.