Grit and Grace; Pursuing Our God-Given Desires With Passion
Jesus asks many questions in the gospels. But the most powerful question he asks is, “What do you want?”
For instance, he asks a blind man, Bartimaeus, in Mark 10:51-52, “What do you want me to do for you?” Bartimaeus replies, “Teacher, I want to see.”
Isn’t that interesting? The man is obviously blind, yet Jesus asks “What do you want me to do for you?” He invites Bartimaeus to name it and ask for it, specifically.
A similar question bookends the gospel of John. As Jesus is beginning his ministry, two of John the Baptizer’s disciples follow him. One is Andrew and we aren’t told who the other was. Noticing them, Jesus turns and asks, “What do you want?” Not knowing how to answer, they ask where he is staying. Jesus replies, “Come and you will see.” They spend hours together in intimate conversation, after which, they do indeed follow him. (John 1)
Then in John 18 as Jesus completes his prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane, he is approached by soldiers and officials from the chief priest.
“Whom are you seeking?” he asks. “Jesus of Nazareth,” they reply. “I am he.” And they lead him into the darkness of accusation, trial, and death.
“What do you want me to do for you?”
“What do you want?”
“Whom are you seeking?”
In other words, “What is the longing in your heart? How may I fill it for you?”
Bartimaeus knew exactly what he wanted; he received what he asked for, plus more….
The disciples didn’t know what they wanted or for what/whom they were looking… not at first. But ultimately they come into the presence of Jesus and receive new “eyes” of the heart.
What Do You Want?
When Jesus asks this question today, “What do you want?” how do we answer? How do you answer?
When we know what we want, it often takes grit to achieve it, even with help from God.
In her book, Grit; the Power of Passion and Perseverance, Angela Duckworth recounts her journey of trying to understand why some people can stick with something while others simply don’t.
She has found that at least part of the answer is passion.
“What I mean by passion is not just that you have something you care about. What I mean is that you care about the same ultimate goal in an abiding, loyal, steady way. You are not capricious… Most of your actions derive their significance from their allegiance to your ultimate concern, your life philosophy. You have your priorities in order.” [1]
But where does this passion come from? And how do we cultivate the perseverance to pursue it?
The Desires God Places Within
From a Christian perspective, our deepest desires are not random or accidental. They are woven into the fabric of our being by a loving Creator who uniquely crafted each of us.
As James K.A. Smith argues in You Are What You Love, our hearts are fundamentally oriented towards love, and what we love ultimately shapes who we become. This means that the “wants” that drive us are not simply fleeting whims, but expressions of our deepest selves, reflecting the image of God within us. Smith writes,
He [Jesus] asks, What do you want?” This is the most incisive, piercing question Jesus can ask of us precisely because we are what we want. Our wants and longings and desires are at the core of our identity, the wellspring from which our actions and behavior flow. Our wants reverberate from our heart, the epicenter of the human person. [2]
These desires or “wants” often point toward the unique contribution God has designed us to make in the world. They may lead us to a particular career, a ministry, a creative pursuit, or a way of loving and serving others.
Recognizing these desires as God-given gifts is the first step toward cultivating the grit to pursue them.
Grit and the Christian Journey
Duckworth defines grit as a combination of passion and perseverance for long-term goals. She breaks it down into four key components:
- Interest: “Passion begins with intrinsically enjoying what you do.” [3] This is about discovering and deepening your passion for a particular field or pursuit. It’s about leaning into the things that excite you, that make you come alive. In the Christian context, this could be seen as discerning your spiritual gifts, recognizing the unique passions God has placed within you, and exploring how those passions can be used to serve him and others.
- Practice: Grit requires deliberate practice with consistent effort to improve. “One form of perseverance is the daily discipline of trying to do things better than we did yesterday.” [4] It’s about showing up daily, honing your skills, and striving for excellence. This resonates with the biblical concept of diligence and perseverance. The Apostle Paul, for example, demonstrated incredible grit in his ministry, facing persecution and hardship yet remaining steadfast in his commitment to spreading the Gospel.
- Purpose: This involves connecting your work to a larger purpose beyond yourself. “Your work matters… It is therefore imperative that you identify your work as both personally interesting and, at the same time, integrally connected to the well-being of others.” [5] When you have a clear purpose, you know your efforts contribute to something bigger than yourself, something meaningful and lasting. For Christians, this purpose is ultimately rooted in God’s plan for redemption and his call to love and serve others. As Serrano states in Biblical Principles for Resilience in Leadership, “servant leaders demonstrate a level of altruism, vision, and service that may not exist in other forms of leadership.” [6]
- Hope: “Hope is a rising-to-the-occasion kind of perseverance… It defines every stage of grit.” [7] When you have hope you typically have a growth mindset and believe in your own ability to overcome challenges… Hope means having faith that, with God’s help, you can achieve your goals even when things get tough. Hope is a central theme in the Bible, reminding us that even in the darkest of times, God is with us and has a plan for our lives.
The Power of Mindset
Carol Dweck’s research on mindset further illuminates the connection between our beliefs and our ability to cultivate grit.
A growth mindset, as Dweck describes it, “is based on the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts… everyone can change and grow through application and experience.” [8]
This belief fuels perseverance because it allows us to see challenges and setbacks as opportunities for growth rather than as roadblocks. When we believe we can grow, we are more likely to embrace the effort required to achieve our goals.
The Role of Emotional Health
In The Emotionally Healthy Leader it sounds like author Peter Scazzero is describing grit. He writes,
If you take this book seriously, it will require a lot from you – hard work, perseverance, vulnerability, humility, and a willingness to change. To be sure, you will be challenged. But my prayer is that the challenges will be matched by a compelling vision for how things might be different if you embrace the courageous choices that will wallo God to transform you and your leadership. [9]
Without using the word “grit”, Scazzero has described it perfectly.
It also becomes clearer to understand that self-awareness, emotional regulation, and healthy relationships provide a strong foundation for perseverance and passion.
When we are aware of our own emotions and can manage them effectively, we are less likely to be derailed by setbacks or negative experiences. In addition, strong relationships provide support and encouragement, helping us to stay the course even when things get tough.
Answering the Call
Ultimately, the question “What do you want?” is an invitation to self-discovery and a challenge to align our desires with what God desires for us.
We must look inside our hearts and minds to identify the passions and longings God has placed there.
Rarely is the answer to that question quick. You’ll likely find that you must engage in self-reflection, prayer, and perhaps even some trial and error.
But when we do begin to discern an answer, a partnership with God is required to bring it to fruition. As Philippians 2:13 reminds us, “For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.”
This means that while we have a role to play in pursuing our goals, ultimately it is God who empowers us and guides us toward his plan for our lives.
It’s also important to recognize that our call – or mission – may change throughout our lives. It also may remain static, but LOOK different in implementation over time.
The key is to remain open to God’s leading, to continually seek God’s guidance, and to trust that he will equip us for whatever he calls us to do.
So, as you reflect on Jesus’ question, “What do you want me to do for you?”, consider this: Do you know the answer? And if so, how do you know?
1 – Carol S. Dweck, Mindset; the New Psychology of Success; How We Can Learn to Fulfill Our Potential (New York: Ballantine Books, 2006), 64.
2 – James K. A. Smith, You Are What You Love; the Spiritual Power of Habits (Grand Rapids, Brazos Press, 2016), 1-2.
3 – Angela Duckworth, Grit; the Power of Passion and Perseverance (New York; Scribner, 2016), 91.
4 – Duckworth, 91.
5 – Duckworth, 91.
6 – Carlo A. Serrano, Biblical Principles for Resilience in Leadership; Theory and Cases (Cham, Switzerland, Palgrave Macmillan, 2020), 71.
7 – Duckworth 91-92.
8 – Dweck, 7.
9 – Peter Scazzero, The Emotionally Healthy Leader; How transforming your inner life will deeply transform your church, team, and the world (United States of America: Zondervan, 2015), 22.
About the Author
Debbie Owen
Deborah C. Owen is an experienced spiritual director, Neuro-based Enneagram executive and life coach, disciple maker, professional writer, senior librarian, and long-time church Music Director and lay leader. She has earned the award of National Board Certification for teaching excellence, and a podcasting award, and is pursuing a Doctor of Leadership degree through Portland Seminary at George Fox University. She lives in the backwoods of Maine with her husband and flat-coated retriever. She spends as much time as she can with their 3 grown children, daughter-in-law, and 2 small grandchildren. Find her online at InsideOutMinistries.info.11 responses to “Grit and Grace; Pursuing Our God-Given Desires With Passion”
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Thanks so much for the blog, Debbie. Reflecting on the question “What do you want?” from Jesus, how do you discern whether your heart’s desires align with God’s will?
Yes, Glyn, that’s the very hard question, isn’t it?
For me, it starts with prayer and meditation and being attentive to whatever I’m reading in the Bible and elsewhere. I also pay attention to what people are saying in casual conversation. I may then seek counsel from someone wise, laying out the specific situation.
I also use Ignatian spirituality – paying attention to feelings of consolation and desolation. I’ll also use intellect to lay out the pros and cons. And ultimately, I return to prayer and then ask God to bless whichever choice I feel called to make, because I’m doing my best to listen to God’s guidance.
Hi Debbie, I smiled at Glyn’s question because that Biblical story also caught my eye and had me pondering this morning. Can you imagine sitting at a coffee shop having a casual conversation with someone who asks that question and responds with, “I Am He”? I think I needed that self-reflection after a very long work week (that is still continuing). In your opinion, how can we stay motivated and maintain grit when our desires and calling seem ambiguous or when the path ahead is challenging?
Jennifer, thanks for the question and the image of the coffee shop! 🙂 First, here’s my response to Glyn: https://blogs.georgefox.edu/dlgp/grit-and-grace-pursuing-our-god-given-desires-with-passion/comment-page-1/#comment-216534
Regarding the rest of your question – motivation in the midst of challenging situations – for me it comes down to seeking God in prayer every day. Period. Trusting that if I am doing God’s will, God will continually remind me – externally and internally – about my passion and longing to follow through. God will also remind me that I am not alone in the quest. God is always with me and will support me in unexpected ways as long as I keep focusing on Jesus.
Thank you Debbie. I really appreciate this post. I really like this idea of ‘trial and error’ in discovering what it is we want. What are some follow up questions or evaluative tools people could use in that time of trial and error?
With regard to questions in a trial-and-error period of discernment, I would first focus on “What if…?” scenarios. What if such and such happened, or someone did something? What if I had other options? What if I had NO other options?
Then I would work on “Why?” questions. Why is this so important to me? Why have I been willing to give up xyz for this? Why is this important to other people and does that matter to me?
I could go on, but you get the idea. 🙂
I was thinking about Smith’s book before you mentioned it. I just taught on the first part of chapter 2 of You Are What You Love today. Also glad to see you got the Emotionally Healthy Leader book.
Thinking about Smith’s book, he mentioned the movie Stalker and how these two characters are standing outside The Room deciding whether or not to go in. Smith writes on page 28, “In the room they will achieve their heart’s desire. In the room their dreams will come true. In the room, you get exactly what you want.” Smith says that one of the characters asks, “What if I don’t know what I want?” and they are answered “What you get is not what you think you wish for, but what you most deeply wish for” (p. 28). I question my students given this, would they walk into the room. Do they know what they really wish for? I’m wondering if you yourself know what you want/wish for? Would you be willing to walk into that room?
Personally, I don’t know if I really know what I want some days. I’m not sure I would walk into The Room or how I would answer Jesus.
Jeff, I have been struggling with this question for a number of years now, ever since it was first posed to me during my spiritual director training. Because it’s something we can talk to our directees about!
Sometimes I think I want something big and concrete. Other times I think I want something more intangible that can look many different ways.
If I had to answer the question today… I wouldn’t have a good answer. Maybe I should talk to my spiritual director about it next month!
Hi Julie, I like that you brought up the questions that Jesus asked throughout His life. While He knew the answers before they were spoken, it was important for each person to articulate their need. I agree that when a goal or need is spoken it takes on a new dimension, yet with Jesus, I wonder if part of it was setting the stage that we too need to ask and acknowledge that Jesus knows what we need before we do. Even beyond the recognition that God places our passions within us, in asking Jesus for what we need, we recognize our need for Jesus to walk with us and aid us in perseverance for our part of making those passions become reality. Any thoughts on this?
Diane, great observations about desire and passions. As I just replied to Jeff, I’ve been struggling with the answer to Jesus’s question, “What do you want?” I appreciate your sentiment that perhaps we should recognize our need for Jesus to walk with us, in whatever tasks and responsibilities of life he has placed before us. I think I’ll keep praying over this response. Thanks.
Debbie, I like your practical questions and application to the Christian walk. Which of Duckworths four elements of grit do you think Christians tend to neglect in our journeys (interest, practice, purpose, hope)?