A Story of Overcoming Resistance
“Any act that rejects immediate gratification in favor of long-term growth, health, or integrity. Or, expressed another way, any act that derives from our higher nature instead of our lover. Any of these will elicit Resistance.” [1]
I couldn’t have ended my semester in a better way than to read a book about the enemy of creativity. . . resistance. In the last few weeks, I have been in a battle with this enemy. In Book One of The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks of Your Inner Creative Battles, author Steven Pressfield names several characteristics of resistance. The resistance that I have been experiencing has felt a little crippling, to be honest. This enemy justified my every action to avoid the task at hand, and I am not typically a procrastinator. It has no strength on its own, Pressfield writes but is fed by our fear. [2]
What’s worse is that as I formulated all of the learning, research, interview data, and resources, resistance had recruited allies, especially self-sabotage. I had times where I sat down at my desk and felt paralyzed and overwhelmed. I questioned my motivations and doubted God’s greater purpose for directing me to this program. I prayed, journaled, and cried out to the Lord for direction and affirmation. As I met with young adults and ministry leaders, over and over I heard stories of discouragement, deconstruction, Biblical illiteracy and the church’s adoption of cultural ideologies, and on and on. I documented like crazy but my heart was hurting and the task of collaborating all of this data was too overwhelming. It felt like resistance was winning.
However, resistance can be beaten. The author compares the defeat of resistance to childbirth (been there, done that three times), it seems impossible until you remember that women have been giving birth from the beginning of time, with and without epidurals. [3] Remembering that I am not alone and that my peer group pals and cohort compadres are likely experiencing similar resistance to some degree seemed to remind me that resistance CAN BE BEATEN!
In the midst of all of this resistance manifesting itself in discouragement and procrastination I had a distinct sleepless night, an unusual occurrence for me. At about 1:30 a.m. on this particular Saturday, I debated with myself about whether I should just get up and type or struggle to get more rest. I decided to stay in bed but my mind was reeling with so many thoughts. Earlier in the week I had been reading about Samuel in 1 Samuel 3:1-21. Samuel, a boy who ministered before the Lord under the priest Eli, did not yet know the Lord. Samuel was resting in the house of the Lord near the ark of the covenant. The Lord spoke to Samuel. Samuel replies, “Here I am” and ran to Eli because he had mistaken the voice for that of Eli. Samuel returned to rest and heard the voice again. From 1 Samuel,
“Now Samuel did not yet know the Lord: The word of the Lord had not yet been revealed to him. A third time the Lord called, “Samuel!” And Samuel got up and went to Eli and said, “Here I am; you called me.” Then Eli realized that the Lord was calling the boy. So Eli told Samuel, “Go and lie down, and if he calls you, say, ‘Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.’” So Samuel went and lay down in his place. The Lord came and stood there, calling as at the other times, “Samuel! Samuel!” Then Samuel said, “Speak, for your servant is listening.” [4]
In this moment of sleeplessness, I heeded Eli’s words to Samuel and went back to rest and determined at that moment that if the Lord called, I would respond with “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.” So I laid in bed waiting. The last time I remember peering at my alarm clock, it read 2:34 a.m. I fell asleep and had the most vivid dream. In my dream, I said the words “Speak Lord, your servant is listening.” The dream continued revealing specific details for one of my prototypes. I shot out of bed around 7:11 a.m. and proceeded down to my chair with my blanket and a cup of coffee. I lit the candle that sits next to my chair and grabbed my journal. I frantically sketched images, words, concepts and details that were so vividly received in my dream. The resistance battle had been beaten and the Lord, an ever present help in time of trouble, was the Hero of my journey again.
“I’m thanking God, who makes things right.I’m singing the fame of heaven-high God.” Psalm 7:17
[1] Steven Pressfield, The War of Art (New York, NY: Black Irish Entertainment, 2012), 6.
[2] Ibid, 16.
[3] Ibid, 57.
[4] 1 Samuel 3:7-10, NIV
[5] Psalm 7:17, MSG
7 responses to “A Story of Overcoming Resistance”
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Cathy, I really love that you took Pressfield’s work and used it as a tool to listen to the Lord. That’s really the point, isn’t it? To not just fight resistance in our own power, but, like spiritual warfare, to do it in the strength of the Lord. Thanks for this revelation.
Cathy,
Thank you for sharing your experience. Your topic can be so heavy for the heart. We have seen and tasted the goodness of God over our lifetimes and seeing how culture, the church, and the effects on upcoming generations is playing out needs to bring us to our knees. Thank you for answering the call to do work in this area and listening to God’s voice of hope in the process.
Hi Cathy,
Thank you for detailing how you worked through resistance, relied on God, and listened so carefully to His voice. I am impressed that you were able to rest and allow God to speak to you. I am excited to hear more about your project and grateful for your heart to listen to the distress of others, particularly your attentiveness to young adults and ministry leaders.
Enjoy your break and the Advent season.
Hi Cathy,
Thanks for the reminder… Then Samuel said, “Speak, for your servant is listening.”
As we dive into our NPO work, I need to remember this verse as I plow through each book, statistical research, article and the social media blitz on immigration.
Chivers cautions me as I look at border asylum seeker numbers, “..Along the way we will need to remind ourselves that those numbers stand for something. Often the represent people, or if not people, then things that matter to people.
Here I am lord your servant is listening.
Cathy,
Your post was so honest and came full circle and I’m happy for you! It’s been a rough semester, huh. I agree. I full on believe that God speaks to us in our dreams and inviting God to speak through our dream state. God shows up that way often. I wonder if it’s when we can actually listen because our resistance is down. Thank you for your vulnerability:). Dream On Sister!!
Cathy~
As I read your post and the dream you had after you rested, I thought of the Scripture where the Psalmist says he is asleep on his bed but his heart instructs him. I also thought about Lieberman’s comment when he said, “What we want is to be fully alive!” Your dream ripped the veil of the ordinary away and God gave you a vision or a dream of what you were resisting.
Perhaps Lieberman would say it was your unconscious–or your uncontrolled mind. As Christians who listen to a God who speaks all the time, I believe you asked God to respond to your battle–He heard your cry. Thanks for your post!
Wow Cathy!
Your account of battling resistance and ultimately finding inspiration through your dream is a powerful testimony to the creative process and the role of faith. The way you connected your experience with the story of Samuel in the Bible adds depth to your narrative and emphasizes the importance of being open to divine guidance. Your persistence in the face of resistance is a reminder that creativity and meaningful work often require perseverance. Thank you for sharing this inspiring story of overcoming resistance with faith and determination.