Why Level 2 Relationships Matter Most in Leadership
At the heart of leadership is a choice: will we remain transactional, or will we step into deeper trust and openness? In Humble Leadership, Schein & Schein argue that Level 2 relationships—connections that honor the whole person rather than just the role—are foundational for growth and transformation. They provide the ground on which something new and better can grow.
As they explain, “Leadership will therefore require the creation of personal relationships that will make others feel safe enough to be open and trusting with their leaders and with the other members of the team that is striving to create something new and better.”[1] These personized relationships cultivate the openness and psychological safety that allow people to work together in meaningful ways.
In a similar vein, the French philosopher Simone Weil reminds us that what is sacred in a person is not their role or their personality, but their whole being—their thoughts, their body, their very life.[2]This insight resonates with Schein & Schein’s vision of humble leadership: seeing people in their wholeness, not merely in their roles.
The authors outline a relational continuum—beginning with negative interactions, moving through transactional exchanges, and culminating in whole-person and deeply intimate connections. Within this continuum, Level 2 relationships stand out as indispensable for leadership. Schein & Schein emphasize: “Leadership is always a relationship, and truly successful leadership thrives in a substrate of high openness and high trust.”[3] Humble leadership, in other words, is relational at its core.
This dynamic of openness and trust also shows up in Amy Edmondson’s work on psychological safety. She describes it as the kind of environment where people feel free to take risks—asking questions, offering ideas, and even admitting mistakes—because they know those things are welcomed.”[4] It’s in this kind of space that learning and adaptability really take root. And as Schein and Schein remind us, the new and better comes from relationships built on high openness and high trust.
But building these relationships is never simple. Many people retreat to the safety of technical culture, where roles are defined and expectations are predictable, but interactions remain transactional. For leaders working to cultivate Level 2 relationships, this reluctance can feel discouraging. I experience this often in North Africa, where trust and openness often unfold more slowly than I expect. Many relationships remain polite and formal, and reciprocity develops gradually, if at all. At times it feels as though the door to deeper connection will never open.
In these moments, humility matters most. I have to keep extending the invitation to connection without forcing it, recognizing that not every relationship will move deeper. As a follower of Jesus, I am reminded that genuine leadership is invitational rather than coercive. In Revelation 3:20, Jesus says: “Behold, I stand at the door and knock.” He does not push His way in but waits to be welcomed. This image embodies humble leadership—patient yet confident, ready to enter, but always honoring others’ readiness.
This is where situational humility matters most. In North Africa, where trust often grows slowly, I have to accept uncertainty, stay curious, and pay attention to what others may see before I do. It also means noticing when my own assumptions get in the way. Practicing this humility helps me listen, wait, and make room for Level 2 relationships—and with them, the possibility of something new and better.
For Schein & Schein, leadership is, above all, relational. And these relationships extend beyond individuals to the life of the whole group. As they explain: “Learning to think and manage in terms of interpersonal and group process is a foundational building block of Humble Leadership.”[5]Level 2 relationships flourish most when the culture around them fosters openness, psychological safety, and belonging. Humble leadership, then, is not only about building trust person-to-person; it is also about shaping communities where people bring their whole selves and collaborate toward meaningful change.
This group emphasis aligns with the RARE Leadership paradigm, which teaches that resilience and maturity grow in community. Warner and Wilder write: “We express the highest version of ourselves when we live out of love. We deny our true selves when we think only of ourselves and not of our group as well.”[6] Their framework highlights four habits that sustain a social culture: Remain relational, Act like yourself, Return to joy, and Endure hardships well. They also remind us: “Joy is not a recipe for avoiding pain. Joy is what enables us to suffer well…those who share our suffering will show us how to remember who we are when things get hard.”[7] In this sense, joy becomes a bond that strengthens trust, making hardship more bearable when carried together.
Warner and Wilder add: “Maturity grows in a group, and we rarely consider the importance of our group’s identity or capacity either as part of a leader’s job or for the development of future leaders.”[8] Humble leaders, therefore, nurture not only individual trust but also group identities rooted in a sense of belonging and resilience.
Ultimately, humble leadership is less about technical expertise and more about the social—showing up with openness, trust, and a willingness to be shaped by others. It asks us to keep knocking without forcing, to remain curious even in uncertainty, and to nurture spaces where people and communities can flourish. This is the leadership I want to grow into: not transactional, but relational, marked by the kind of connections that make collaboration, resilience, and the possibility of something new and better come to life.
[1] Edgar H. Schein and Peter A. Schein, Preface to Humble Leadership: The Power of Relationships, Openness, and Trust, 2nd ed. (Oakland, CA: Berrett-Koehler, 2021), 12, Kindle edition.
[2] Simone Weil, Selected Essays, 1934–1943: Historical, Political, and Moral Writings, trans. Richard Rees (Eugene, OR: Wipf & Stock Publishers, 1962), 9.
[3] Schein and Schein, Preface to Humble Leadership, ix, Kindle edition.
[4] Amy C. Edmondson, Right Kind of Wrong: The Science of Failing Well (New York: Simon Element / Simon Acumen, 2023), 15-16, Kindle edition.
[5] Schein and Schein, Preface to Humble Leadership, 73, Kindle edition.
[6] Marcus Warner and Jim Wilder, RARE Leadership: 4 Uncommon Habits for Increasing Trust, Joy, and Engagement in the People You Lead (Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2016), 144, Kindle edition.
[7] Warner and Wilder, RARE Leadership, 177, Kindle Edition.
[8] Warner and Wilder, RARE Leadership, 201, Kindle Edition.
About the Author
Elysse Burns
18 responses to “Why Level 2 Relationships Matter Most in Leadership”
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
Wow Elysse,
Your post is a beautiful tapestry of relational theology, leadership wisdom, and lived experience. Thank you for sharing!
How can leaders cultivate Level 2 relationships in cultures where trust unfolds slowly, balancing patience with persistent invitation and honoring each person’s readiness to connect?
Hi Shela,
That’s a good question. Since starting this doctoral program, I’ve spent quite a bit of time studying ethnocentrism for my project portfolio, especially how cultural superiority can influence the way we relate to others. I’ve found that coming with the posture of a learner is one of the best mindsets—especially in cultures where trust takes time to build (and often with good reason).
I believe this approach also opens the way for deeper Level 2 relationships—connections that move beyond roles and surface interactions to genuinely honor people in their wholeness. As a Christian, my hope is to be a light among the people I live with, showing dignity and respect even when it isn’t always returned. It’s not always easy, but it feels important.
Great post Elysse! Thank You! In your experience, how does culture and tradition impact the ability to build Level 2 relationships and practice situational humility?
Hi Ryan,
Thank you for your question. I was recently talking with Kari about the text and how, as Christians working overseas, we often arrive with urgency to build Level 2 relationships and a desire to “fix” people. But once in a new country, it quickly becomes clear that many may not want deeper relationships—or to be “fixed.” That realization forces us to dismantle old assumptions and confront unconscious biases.
Culture and tradition aren’t what stand in the way of deeper relationships—our motives and stereotypes are. That’s why coming with a posture of learning is essential, not only for navigating other cultures, but for re-examining our own.
Elysse,
Always a good time to bring in Simone Weil. I have been thiknkiing about this as well for a while. In the context of evangelization, sometimes people feel the need to practically force a conversion and argue the merits of Christianity. (There might very well be a good time and place for this, but I think it is minimal.) On the other hand, I think that it is important that we strive for those relationships and invite people into the journey of seeking Jesus with us. These are my thoughts that I have been wrestling through as I write an article for a journal.
Hi Adam,
I wrestle with these thoughts every day as I interact with people I deeply long to see in a relationship with the true God. Someone once gave me a piece of advice that has stayed with me: “When the Holy Spirit is in it, it’s easy.” I believe that. I think of Scripture and how, when people’s hearts were ready, Jesus revealed himself so clearly.
We often put immense pressure on ourselves to act with urgency, but I don’t think God is in a hurry. I’ve also had to come to terms with free will and the need to respect it. Some of my friends may never choose to follow Jesus, and while that is painful to accept, it is ultimately their decision.
What I hold to is this: I would rather know that I showed as much love as I could, shared truth when the opportunity arose, prayed for them, and walked alongside them—rather than trying to get them to say a magic prayer that “secures” their eternal destiny. This might sound a bit harsh, but I think you understand where I’m coming from.
I love how you brought in RARE Leadership traits; great connection!
I’ve also recently heard Amy Edmondson’s name a few times. What can you tell me about her work and what is most important to you about it?
Hi Debbie,
I first came across Amy Edmonson’s work while writing a syntopical essay. The quote I mention in my blog post is from her book “Right Kind of Wrong: The Science of Failing Well.” It’s the only book of hers I’ve read so far, but I deeply value her insights on psychological safety, which I see as closely tied to humble leadership.
The idea of creating spaces where people can fail safely resonates with me personally—I tend to be reserved and often struggle to voice my thoughts in groups of naturally assertive people. I see the same dynamic in Mauritania, where unless you are in a high position—or more often, male—you rarely get the chance to speak. One of my goals here has been to create spaces of psychological safety where young women can have a voice.
Excellent post, Elysse. I love how you have integrated this into your experiences and have named the tensions in that context.
I find this challenging in our context as well. Even though people don’t consider themselves to be hierarchical, and speak the language of collaboration, their behaviour reveals otherwise.
What advice would you have for me in this context?
Hi Graham,
Thank you for your good and challenging question. My gut reaction is to say “quit and start all over.” I’m joking, of course—but sometimes it does feel like the easiest option. In reality, I wrestle with this question a lot.
One thing I’ve noticed in this doctoral program is how often we use words without truly understanding them. Take “collaboration,” for example—how many of us use it without knowing what it really means or what healthy collaboration should look like? This reading challenged me to think more seriously about creating healthy environments where relationships can grow and collaboration can actually happen. Yet with our busy schedules, travel, and speaking engagements, how many of us have lifestyles that really allow for that kind of depth? Until people recognize it as a problem, we’ll always default to what’s comfortable—and true collaboration is often uncomfortable. I know you understand this.
My project faculty encouraged me not to be ashamed of small beginnings. Because top-down approaches are so ingrained in us, change won’t come with one giant swoop but through steady, small steps. I think starting the conversation is already a meaningful beginning, and I’m sure you’ve done that. Ultimately, it will take a culture shift, and people have to be ready for it.
I realize I may not be fully answering your question here, but I’d love to talk more with you about it in Cape Town.
Elysse, this sentence perfectly summarizes the culture in which we live: “Many people retreat to the safety of technical culture, where roles are defined and expectations are predictable, but interactions remain transactional.” What have you personally found is helpful as you invite people to step out of the safety of level 1 relationships?
Hi Kari,
The most helpful thing I’ve learned is to be patient and not lose heart when a relationship feels uneven or lacks reciprocity. As I mentioned the other day, Christians working overseas often arrive with urgency to build Level 2 relationships and even a desire to “fix” people. But real relationships take time. They need patience, steady nurturing, and sometimes a willingness to give far more than we receive.
Even when the process feels slow or one-sided, I’ve come to see that the investment is never wasted. Over time, trust grows, and those small, faithful steps often open the door to deeper connection and real transformation—for them and for us. And I know this is something you not only understand but also live out.
Hi Elysse. I love how you connected the dots throughout your post, particularly Simone Well. You highlighted your desire to move from transactional to relational leadership. What do you feel is the biggest asset that will come from making the switch?
Hi Daren,
Thank you for your question. The first word that comes to mind is organic. When relationships shift from transactional to whole-person, they open space for greater creativity, genuine enjoyment, and the resilience needed to persevere in the work. Growth in these contexts feels natural rather than forced, and I believe that is a significant asset.
Hello, Ms. Burns, thank you for your post it is very informative and filled with inspiration. I have learn a lot from it. I couldn’t agree more on how you have empathized ‘humble leadership’ as relationship and connection that is based on ‘openness, trust and the willingness to be shaped by others.’ I have seen this in many of our Micronesian Churches where the leaders have difficulties connecting with the congregation. Thank you again for the post, Elysse!
Hi Noel,
Thank you for your kind words! You mentioned that leaders in Micronesian churches sometimes struggle to connect with their congregants. Having grown up in a pastor’s home, I witnessed firsthand the delicate balance leaders must maintain between shepherd and congregant—it’s such a nuanced and often challenging role. I truly appreciate your thoughtful encouragement.
Hi Elysse, I love how you pointed back to Revelation 3:20. Jesus is truly a humble leader that makes an invitation and is humble enough to accept our responses to that invitation. You already strike me as a humble leader. I am curious what felt new to you in reading this book or how much was affirmation for how you already operate?
Hi Christy,
Thank you for your kind words and thoughtful question. I naturally gravitate toward one-on-one interactions, and at times I assume everything is fine because those individual relationships feel steady. Yet I’ve realized it’s not only about having good individual relationships—there can still be contention between others that I may not see, or someone may feel comfortable approaching me but not another person.
This book reminded me of the importance of creating spaces where everyone has the opportunity to grow into Level 2 relationships, rather than focusing only on my own one-on-one connections. Looking back on my administrative role at the clinic, I don’t think I did this as well as I could have—I was preoccupied with trying to understand what lay beneath the cultural “iceberg” (or sand dune, in my case). Still, it’s a lesson I want to carry forward into whatever comes next.