Aristotle’s Happiness Project
“It occurred to me that there were two sets of virtues, the resume virtues and the eulogy virtues. The resume virtues are the skills you bring to the marketplace. The eulogy virtues are the ones talked about at your funeral–whether you were kind, brave, honest or faithful. Were you capable of deep love?”-David Brooks, The Moral Bucket List
“Without friends, no one would want to live, even if [they] had all other goods.” -Aristotle, Ethics
David Brooks is a political and cultural commentator, as well as the Executive Director of the Aspen Institute. Many of us read his regular column in the New York Times and his featured work in The Atlantic Monthly, Newsweek, and The Weekly Standard. My favorite way to hear Brooks was in person at a small leadership conference at Westmont College in June of 2022 where I first heard him read a draft of his latest book, How to Know a Person[1]. In June of 2015, he published a piece in NYT titled The Moral Bucket List[2] where he writes about experiences that offer us the richest possible inner life:
- The Humility Shift: what is an element of pride you’ve neglected to address?
- Self-Defeat: what is a weakness you need to confront and how?
- The Dependency Leap: what is a deep connection you’ve been avoiding?
- Energizing Love: what is the energizing love prompting an unshakable commitment?
- That Call Within the Call: what is the call within you call?
- The Conscience Leap: have you had a conscience leap?
- What does it mean to see life as a moral adventure?
It seems Brooks is asking philosophically dense questions, or at least pointed questions about human flourishing, during a time when leaders desperately need someone to differentiate between our resume virtues and our eulogy virtues.
I began this blog post with a contemporary writer and thinker who is asking similar questions about the inward journey, the inner voice, and becoming oneself through self-examination–as the author whose work I chose to read this week: Aristotle’s Nicomachean Ethics. Although hundreds of years apart, I am struck how both authors unearth reflections that help us pay attention to our sense of calling. Both confront us on what we care about most and how those deep values inform our sense of work and contribution to the world through and in our vocations–and how relationships inform our calling.
Might it be worth it to reflect on our sense of calling as we read these posts and how it relates to what we are doing in our “careers” or our leadership and how our thinking has evolved these past two years?
Aristotle (384-322 BCE) was a Greek philosopher whose contributions have shaped much of Western thought. He became a student of Plato’s at 17 years old, studying at his Academy in Athens for twenty years. Nicomachean Ethics[3] consists of 10 books, written around 350 BCE. Aristotle is exploring a key Socratic question: How should human beings best live? Aristotle’s focus in Ethics is on the practical, rather than the theoretical, responses to that question. This work would become foundational to later Western pursuits of philosophy and ethics. Medieval philosophers and theologians like Thomas Aquinas, Francis Bacon, and Thomas Hobbes, would eventually base their work from Aristotle’s insights.
Reading Aristotle causes me to reflect on happiness and fulfillment–what it is and where it comes from. Is happiness something that is normal human behavior? The book starts off with naming the three kinds of life, according to Aristotle: The pleasurable life, the political life and the contemplative Life. Within these three types of life, Aristotle believes that cultured and active human beings pursue honor by conferring it on others rather than seeking to be honored. He claims that common, run of the mill lazy human beings seek the pleasurable life by seeking to be honored.
Aristotle is not saying that seeking one’s honor is not wrong; in fact, he makes the point that our honor depends upon those who confer it. If we pursue honor to assure ourselves of our worth, then we must seek it from those who really, truly know us. Further, the honor we crave from those who know us will only give us honor if it’s based on excellence.
Do we believe this to be true? And how might a reflection on happiness/fulfillment help us honestly answer this question? How much of what makes us happy derives from the honor or recognition that others bestow upon us?
The chapter continues with Aristotle answering his own question as he covers the topic of self-sufficiency when he writes, “ . . . not by “self” alone. We do not mean a human being who lives their life in isolation, but someone who lives also with parents, children, spouse, friends and fellow citizens generally, since humans are by nature a social and political being.”[4]
Still arguing for human beings to only pursue happiness, he then offers a definition of happiness:
“We may define happiness as prosperity combined with virtue; or as independence of life; or as the secure enjoyment of the maximum pleasure; or as a good condition of property and body, together with the power of guarding one’s property and making use of them.”[5]
If I were to summarize what I think Aristotle is speaking to us from more than 300 years ago in his writings, I would point us back to David Brook’s Moral Bucket List. Happiness is seeking the good life, the flourishing life, a life that finds sufficiency in what one already has in rich relationships, meaningful work, vocation and finding one’s worth in the eyes of another person who sees the good, the excellence.
How might this teach us something about leadership? I find Aristotle and Brooks shining a light on what Martyn Percy said to us one year ago:
“Leadership taps into your personal life, self, health, partnerships, mental, physical and spiritual life–learn to listen and to attend. The bedrock of the flourishing life is being attentive, kind and disciplined.”[6] Leaders must first and foremost care for their relationships like the Psalmist who claims, “As for the saints (godly people) who are in the land, they are the majestic and the noble and the excellent ones in whom is all my delight.”[7]
[1] Brooks, David. How to Know a Person. The Art of Seeing and Being Seen.
[2] Brooks, David. “Opinion | The Moral Bucket List.” The New York Times, April 11, 2015, sec. Opinion. https://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/12/opinion/sunday/david-brooks-the-moral-bucket-list.html.
[3] Aristotle, and John Alexander Smith. Nicomachean Ethics. Edited by Graphyco Editions. Translated by Drummond Percy Chase. Independently published, 2021.
[4] P. 30.
[5] P. 31
[6] Martyn Percy. Oxford Advance. September 23, 2023.
[7] Psalm 16:3, AMP.
About the Author
Pam Lau
Pamela Havey Lau brings more than 25 years of experience in speaking, teaching, writing and mediating. She has led a variety of groups, both small and large, in seminars, trainings, conferences and teachings. Pam’s passion is to see each person communicate with their most authentic voice with a transparent faith in Jesus Christ. With more than 10, 000 hours of writing, researching, and teaching the heart and soul of Pam’s calling comes from decades of walking alongside those who have experienced healing through pain and peace through conflict. As a professor and author, Pam deeply understands the role of mentoring and building bridges from one generation to another. She has developed a wisdom in how to connect leaders with their teams. Her skill in facilitating conversations extends across differences in families, businesses, schools, universities, and nonprofits. Pam specializes in simplifying complex issues and as a business owner, has helped numerous CEOs and leaders communicate effectively. She is the author of Soul Strength (Random House) and A Friend in Me (David C. Cook) and is a frequent contributor to online and print publications. You can hear Pam’s podcast on Real Life with Pamela Lau on itunes. Currently, Pam is a mediator for families, churches, and nonprofits. You can contact Pam through her website: PamelaLau.com. Brad and Pam live in Newberg, Oregon; they have three adult daughters and one son-in-law. One small, vocal dog, Cali lives in the family home where she tries to be the boss! As a family they enjoy worshiping God, tennis, good food and spending time with family and friends.6 responses to “Aristotle’s Happiness Project”
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Lots to unpack here, Pam, but I will camp on these two points:
1) I really like your calling out the ‘good life’ as defined by Brooks and Aristotle, which is deeper and more nuanced than the good life we see on Instagram. Which leads me to
2) your question of what this teaches us about leadership: How might this nuanced view of the good life inform how we as leaders help those in our care to achieve such a life? I think that is part of the calling of leadership.
Jen,
A question for you is how do those in leadership above you encourage you to have the “good life”? Do they recognize the signs of the lack of flourishing in those who “are in their care”? Do you notice that in those you lead? And how do you respond?
Happiness is seeking the good life, the flourishing life, a life that finds sufficiency in what one already has in rich relationships, meaningful work, vocation and finding one’s worth in the eyes of another person who sees the good, the excellence.
I like your summary! I think a lot of us read books that continue to find a way to speak to us still. What do you find excellent in your life Pam? Are there areas that you’d like more? less?
Hi Pam!
Thank you for your book selection and posts, which I found very insightful. You brilliantly link happiness to looking at others and listening to them. In our cohort, you are the one person outside my peer group willing to talk to me at length and lend an ear to listen (even though my English is sometimes not so good). You are a leader, Pam! I am sure you have found and continue to experience happiness, and those around you find it from you, too!
Dinka,
You write reflecting how I see you! You are a teacher to me in so many ways! I hope we can stay in contact even after we graduate. What a gift this cohort is and has been.
Hi! Jana~ I love the question of what do I find excellent in my life? Right now, I am finding the transition from “family life” to having adult, married daughters surprisingly excellent and difficult at the same time.
But areas I find excellent through and through would be the rich relationships cultivated through a life of meaningful connections. What brings the most honor is life, for me, is time-tested, trusted working and personal relationships. I’ve experienced relationships where people give up out of offense or weakness, too. But the flourishing life of staying commitment truly does energize.
Along those same lines is the commitment I have made to my calling as a communicator. Even when certain jobs or opportunities didn’t turn out the way I had hoped, the commitment to vocation feels energizing which also brings honor.
How about you, Jana? I hope you are finding the good life in teaching!
Thanks for asking!