Tortured Souls and the Church
If the Eucharist is an act of defiance and a way to re-member the body of Christ back together, then torture is the antithesis of this, as it is breaks down the person and dismembers the community. When people start to “disappear” from the shameful experiences and choices made, the church threatens to “disappear” if it remains unresponsive. What if the church walked with those in pain and gave them opportunities to recover from the torture and trauma many have suffered at the hands of others, or from the choices they’ve made?
I am reminded of a young woman I worked with who was held hostage for days and was tortured and raped by an evil man, then released. In therapy, she struggled to recount or even talk about the terrifying ordeal. Shame that was not hers’ to bear kept her silent and she cried and rocked, muttering broken pieces of her story. Her words were fragmented, but she was able to draw her feelings, or rather scribble her feelings as artful pictures failed her. She scribbled so hard she broke all the crayons and pencils. Next, she ripped up paper, talking about how horrible the torturer was with whatever words came to mind. Her rage kept growing, so we went outside behind the office and threw rocks, pounded wood with a bat, and yelled. If I observed or stopped she would stop, embarrassed and self-conscious, so I was just as active ripping, tearing, beating wood, yelling and throwing rocks as she was, in an attempt to help her recover her voice and power. As her body moved in more aggressive motions, her voice went from whimpers to yells as we scribbled, pounded, and threw things. We were both out of breath and exhausted and laughed as we wondered what people would say if they saw us. But miraculously, she had recovered her voice and her power. The details she will probably never be able to recount, nor do I think they really matter. Recovering her voice, re-distributing the shame, and expressing her power was what counted most, and to know she was not alone moved the traumatic experience to a painful experience she was able to heal from.
Torture can come in overt ways, like physical and emotional abuse, and are easy to identify, diagnosis and provide treatment for. But torture can come in more covert and sinister ways, like never getting your desires fulfilled, no matter how many things you buy or consume. Because they don’t adequately quench the real desires, it makes the consumer just want to buy more, while never getting their true desires fulfilled. This is a tortuous way for a soul to live. It’s like someone being thirsty and hungry and never able to drink water or eat a nutritious meal. Capitalistic countries often promote this covert torture, as individuals are encouraged to buy and pursue things that are easy to obtain but provides malnutrition for the soul. It is a divine design for the church to point people to their true desires and offer nutritious ways to fulfill their desires, thus providing health for the individual and the body. Similarly, it is a compassionate and healing act to provide comfort and hope for a person hurting from pains delivered to the body and soul by helping them recover their voice, power, and self-respect. In so doing, this makes the church irreplaceable and a coveted companion in the lives of all people.
About the Author
Jennifer Dean-Hill
8 responses to “Tortured Souls and the Church”
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“If I observed or stopped she would stop, embarrassed and self-conscious, so I was just as active ripping, tearing, beating wood, yelling and throwing rocks as she was, in an attempt to help her recover her voice and power.”
Praise the Lord, Jen! It’s just this part about Jesus eating with the sinners and healing outcasts and freeing people from demons and spending time with others who are hurting that makes the message we want to share as the Church appealing.
Thank you for pointing out that “this makes the church irreplaceable and a coveted companion in the lives of all people.” We do have something that the ‘state’ doesn’t – we make people ‘visible’ again.
You have given me a lot to think about. We can all agree that torture is bad. In fact, we can all agree that torture is evil.
Yet, unmet desires are not bad. They are certainly not evil. Unfulfilled desires can build character and maturity.
Having said that, I agree with you that our culture of excess has led to an epidemic of depression.
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/275044.php
Agreed, unmet desires are not bad, rather desires met with inappropriate means create a myriad of problems. Like emotional eating for in the attempt to meet the true desire of love. This is what creates perpetual issues.
When people start to “disappear” from the shameful experiences and choices made, the church threatens to “disappear” if it remains unresponsive.
You know we may need to redefine our word ‘church.’ Are we waiting for our church leaders to do the work; or Should it be the church individuals that take action? Many of us wait on the pastor to do it and then sit in the pews and say Amen. This election is a sample of those who disappeared but were awaken when hatred, bigotry, racism under the umbrella of ‘making America great again” was brought to the forefront as okay.
We must be aware that all of God’s people are important and those who are lost must be addressed with the love of God. Now the challenge is, there are those who misinterpret the word of God to support there own agenda. Then we must stand on that scripture, “When the people called by my name turen away from their wicked ways, then will I heal the land.” Just saying…
Your story brought tears to my eyes. I’m thankful you helped this woman find a creative and cathartic way to respond to the awfulness that was inflicted upon her.
“the church threatens to “disappear” if it remains unresponsive.”
That is so convicting! I agree; I think our American church has been soft and comfortable, cozying up to the state, or at the very least, benefitting from a comfortable relationship with it. When I read that phrase, by mind goes to the current anxiety-filled situation for many in my community (and church community) who are undocumented or know someone who is. I want our church to be brave enough to take risks to prevent parts of our body from disappearing across the border. Alas, we seem more intent on celebrating how much we’ve been “blessed” and not recognizing the opportunity facing us to respond to that “blessing.”
Jen, thanks for sharing that story. Very powerful!
“What if the church walked with those in pain and gave them opportunities to recover from the torture and trauma many have suffered at the hands of others, or from the choices they’ve made?”
This is so powerful, as is your story, Jen! I’m so glad you were there to walk with that young woman in her pain. It feels like we in the church prefer to keep things sanitized, forgetting that the story of Christ’s life, death, and resurrection is messy and dirty and ugly. Even the resurrection caused pain and fear. Imagine if, in churches, we did a bit of what you did for that young woman, yelling and tearing up paper about the pain in our lives, the grief that Christ was crucified, and the confusion the resurrection causes when we feel like we are still being crucified.
Wow Jen!!! That story brought me to tears for so many reasons! First, for the woman and her pain. Second, because we live in a society where acts like this occur. Third, because we as the church (collectively) have failed in many ways to walk alongside those being tortured and in pain.
I agree that we have an opportunity to do. If indeed the Eucharist is both vertical in our relationship with God and horizontal in sharing in communion with each other then we must be moved beyond empathy to action.