They Are Precious in His Sight
I came into this blog post knowing that I wanted to title it: “Red and Yellow, Black and White.” If you grew up in the church, or for that matter, didn’t have your head buried in the sand for the entirety of your human existence, you would have [most likely] heard, or at least heard OF, the Sunday School song called “Jesus Loves the Little Children.”
“Red, Yellow, Black and White they are precious in His sight, Jesus loves the little children of the world.”
Is it coming back to you now?
Welp, I Googled the phrase “Red, Yellow, Black and White” just to insure that I had the wording correct before writing this blog post, and the first entry I clicked on, in no uncertain terms, let me, the “Googler” know that this seemingly innocent and positively-intended song is a “negative categorization by color.”
Ah, dang.
After reading Sway by Pragya Agarwal, I guess I should have KNOWN THAT!
But here’s the deal, and it’s the point that this author quite admirably has made: unconscious/implicit bias is baked into almost every aspect of the human experience. Agarwal contends that “we carry these biases within us” (Agarwal, 15). One of the authors chapter headings is “Hardwired,” and that seems to be an adequate term for how we carry biases internally, implicitly, and unconsciously.
In other words, I can personally grow up singing “Red and Yellow, Black and White,” and then sing it to my kids, and then to my grandkids, without really knowing how language and race are connected and reinforcing of negative or insufficient stereotypes.
Now I know. And knowing is half the battle.
And a battle it is. Not to say that my battle is even remotely close to the battles that marginalized people and people groups have experienced through history (until this very day), because it is NOT even REMOTELY. However, it is a battle, nevertheless.
It’s difficult to remain continually aware of what biases may exist within my heart, how those biases present themselves in both explicit and implicit ways, and how to be better about it all. This is a never-ending challenge. One might say it’s a wicked problem.
Sway comprehensively unravels the way our unconscious biases affect the way we communicate, make day-t0-day decisions (from job interviews to romantic relationships) and perceive the world. It goes yet further to reveal how those unconscious biases reinforce and perpetuate systemic and structural inequalities. In my opinion, these are wicked problems that may never get fixed, only managed. Now, I don’t think of myself as a pessimist. I lean heavily towards being an optimist, although that characteristic has been waning of late. More accurately, to quote rapper Iggy Azalea in Fancy, “first things first, I’m the realest, drop this and let the whole world feel it.”
Wait. I’m THE Realest? I always thought she said “I’m A realist.” The words “realest” and “realist” look and sound so similar, but alas, they are not.
So, here I am yet again, deferring to Google on a lyric that I want to quote in this blog, only to discover that for years I’ve been saying it wrongly.
Why do I mention all this? Am I just rambling? Answer: NO!
The point I’m trying to make is that all too often we, nay I, get it wrong. And we, nay I, repeat it wrongly. I was committed to quoting two lyrics, one of which I quoted wrongly and probably is a subtle case of cultural appropriation (even though she is a white rapper), and the other lyric I now know has an unconscious bias baked in. A song about the stereotypical colors of people groups on our planet certainly has a catchy tune, but it also negatively categorizes individuals.
What will we, nay I, do with new and improved information?
My personal prayer is that I would be a person that can receive correction, and graciously change. I don’t want to get stuck. Stuck in past preferences. Stuck in “that’s how I’ve always done it.” Stuck in patterns that no longer serve my desire to “become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some.” (Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians 9:22).
The broader context of verse 22 perhaps is in order:
Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings. 1 Corinthians 9:19-23
It’s as if the Apostle Paul is saying: ALL are precious in God’s sight. ALL are worthy of love and respect. ALL are opportunities afforded to us to not demand OUR RIGHTS, but rather express honor and esteem to one another.
Drop this and let the whole world feel it: Everyone is precious in His sight. Now that’s a song worth singing!
About the Author
John Fehlen
John Fehlen is currently the Lead Pastor of West Salem Foursquare Church. Prior to that he served at churches in Washington and California. A graduate of Life Pacific University in San Dimas, CA in Pastoral Ministry, and Vanguard University in Costa Mesa, CA with a Masters in Leadership and Spirituality. He and his wife Denise have four grown children and four grandchildren. John is the author of “Intentional Impressions," a book for fathers and their sons, "Don't Give Up: Encouragement for Weary Souls in Challenging Times," a book for pastoral leaders, and "The Way I See You," a children's book. You can connect with John on Instagram (@johnfehlen) as well as on his blog (johnfehlen.com).11 responses to “They Are Precious in His Sight”
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John, one of the things I like about your post is a willingness to make a mistake and – this is key- receive feedback on that mistake with grace. As I listen to experts in the field of DEI, I hear that the objective desire is to create space for dialogue that will surface the biases we all carry, and I think you have modeled that well, here. Its my hope that I can also create such a space for dialogue!
Jennifer, I think (and I consider myself an expert on people) ALREADY amazing at creating that kind of space for dialog and understanding!
I was just this morning talking to a friend about someone else…yes we were talking behind someone’s back. This person, we both agreed, lacks massive amounts of self-awareness. Massive. They just don’t get it, and don’t see where they suck life out of a space, miss social cues, and insert themselves where they ought not.
My point in saying that is to say: it’s usually easy to see in OTHERS, and yet hard to see in OURSELVES.
Lord, help others, oops, I mean, ME. 🙂
John, great post. So I’m going to pull out a couple of seemingly obscure / tangential parts of your post. The first is what you said about not wanting to get stuck (“I don’t want to get stuck. Stuck in past preferences. Stuck in ‘that’s how I’ve always done it.'”). The second is your reference to job interviews when it comes to how our unconscious bias might affect our day-to-day decisions. Even though I’m guessing you might not do as many job interviews as you once did (because you are pastoring a big church which probably has others to interview a variety of positions at your church…but I could be wrong), what would you say has changed in your interviews of potential staff over your decades of ministry leadership? Is there a bias that you’ve become more aware of, over time, that you’ve worked on or tweaked in the art of job interviews (or…maybe even performance reviews?)? An area where you’ve moved from being stuck to unstuck? Of course, you could totally punt that question. At any rate, when you said “job interviews,” I immediately began thinking about that myself and how I might conduct an interview today rather than how I may have conducted interviews, say, 20 years ago.
It’s true that I do less than before, but I still am in on the final phase(s) of sign off before hiring. The reason I stopped doing many interviews, besides being in a larger organization, is that I classically would gloss over things. Not sure if this has to do with inherent biases, but because I tend to be an optimist, I would overlook [seemingly] glaring deficiencies. I would size up a person quickly, feel like it’d be a cool fit then hire away, only to later realize I missed a bunch of significant problems.
I’m slower now, let others take the 1st few cracks at the process, then sign off in regards to the primary values of: character, competency, calling, and more importantly for me to chime in on: chemistry.
John,
First, Thank you for inviting our cohort to pause yesterday before we moved without opening the space for others to talk. I deeply appreciated the conversation. To your point in this week’s post, we all get it WRONG and we are still learning. This kind of humility is what I would call radical humility. The fact that a pastor of a large local church can admit that implicit and unconscious bias exists can model for your staff and congregation how to open themselves to change. I’m curious how you see bias play out in our current loneliness epidemic from your positions and ministry?
Thanks for your kind comments Pam.
I’m stuck on your closing question: I’m curious how you see bias play out in our current loneliness epidemic from your positions and ministry?
I don’t immediately know how to respond to that – perhaps more explanation would be helpful. Part of my NPO deals with pastoral loneliness and isolation, but I’m not sure you’re referring to that specifically, but instead general, cultural loneliness…soooo…let me take a crack at it…
I have subconsciously held biases up against certain people, thinking that we would never be able to connect or be friends with one another, only to be pleasantly surprised when I dropped those biases, and made room to get to really know each other. In a very real sense, biases keep us from one another. An invisible barrier of sorts that we mentally/emotionally erect, for the most part, unnecessarily.
I like your answer so far and that makes sense. I think what was on my mind initially when I read your post was IF you observe implicit bias/conscious bias separating your beloved congregants right before your eyes? Like do you think to yourself, “Oh, loved one, if only you and so and so could build a rapport, you would know without a shadow of a doubt how much you have in common?!”
I was just in a meeting for new candidates for ministry and in trying to make an unbiased comment, I think I may have made a biased comment instead. I didn’t say it well- and like the author said in a podcast I listened to, the intention doesn’t matter, the outcome is what matters. Ugh. I too, am learning. Trying to do better. Sometimes, even as I try, I say stupid things. Okay, so often, as I try I say stupid things. Most of the time?
Anyway, we’re on this journey together John!
Intention vs. Outcome. Oh yah. It’s a bummer.
I recall being at a restaurant with close friends of mine (who actually owned the establishment). The wife walked back from the bathroom and saw a Black woman with beautiful hair – gorgeous – I saw it too and was awestruck. She politely said to the woman, “I LOVE your hair, and gently and briefly touched it.”
Welp, that didn’t go well. The woman posted nasty reviews, started a smear campaign against the establishment, etc.
Intention vs. Outcome. It’s so hard to know when something seemingly innocent and well-meaning gets twisted into something wholly other.
Again, I come back to a consistent theme of mine (and the Bible’s too)…GRACE. Oh, how we’re lacking grace for one another. I have to remind myself to have my first and lasting posture to be that of believing in the best in people.
John. Oh man how wrong we all get it.
And I think if we start with that understanding (if we REALLY accept and “own” it) it’s the beginning of the pathway to healing.
I want to be a person, husband, friend, dad, pastor who is able to quickly grasp and admit where I get it wrong.
Same. I echo your response. To me, that’s the essence of humility, biblically and practically.
Humility says: I’m wrong.
Humility says: I’m sorry.
Humility says: I don’t know.
Humility says: Help me understand better.
This posture is a flat out choice, though. It doesn’t come naturally. Pride and position – being right, or at least, thought of as right – these come naturally. Humility is a decision to be made, made again, and again and again.