A New (and Longer) Way of Life
Confession: When I read the title of Gratton and Scott’s book, “The 100-Year Life” (1) my immediate instinctual response was, “No thank you.” My wife thinks that I hold on to the idea of living too loosely, sometimes even taking offense at what she perceives to be my lack of desire to stick around and grow old and be grandparents together. It’s not that I’m not excited about such things, but given the gospel-informed promise of full and eternal life after this one, I just don’t get too worked up about lengthening my stay on this planet. At best this is reflected in the Apostle Paul’s declaration, “To live is Christ and to die is gain” (2), at worst I’m unhealthily detached from my life, possibly depressed, or lack a compelling vision for growing old. Perhaps it is all the above…depending on the day.
No doubt my view of aging is influenced by the experience of the generations before me, which could best be described as a slowly diminishing life that begins to be organized around ever-increasing doctors appointments and memory loss. Yes…let’s do more of that for longer! So, an important word in this book’s title is ‘life’. What is that? In my view there has been copious amounts of thinking, theologizing, and philosophizing around this question as it specifically relates to the beginning of life and not enough as it relates to end of life. If the extra 20 years are filled with continued health, friends (who also keep living), family—where I have the capacity to bless and pour into, a church community that I can engage with and contribute to…awesome! If it’s keeping me hydrated and fed as I slowly move towards fewer and fewer lucid moments and an eventual vegetative state…then again, “No, thank you.”
How’s that for an intro?!
Notwithstanding my initial reaction and all the above, I actually found this book very interesting and helpful—particularly in my current stage of life: I am 53 years old; I have been Pastoring for 28 years; We are about to become empty-nesters in 7 days as our two youngest children move onto their University campus; My wife recently made a career change after 27 years of private practice as a Registered Clinical Counsellor: I’m close to finishing a new degree and feeling a bit restless.
In other words: I am a posterchild for the classic mid-life crisis…or said more positively, “an intentional re-evaluation of life and future.” Again, it depends on the day! So, a few personal responses to this helpful book:
1. Re-framing the Question: Based on my stage of life and age, I have been asking, “What do I want to do for the next 13-18 years?” This book suggests that I need be asking, “What do I want to do for the next 22-25 years? (3). That is not just a change of a number, but a change of perspective—I am just a little over half-way through my working life! If my unexamined cultural assumption is that I’ll work until I am 65 (although deep down I know I will have to work longer due to our lack of financial planning!), then I am asking the ‘What’s next?’ question with an unexpressed and almost unconscious secondary qualifying clause: ‘as I start to wind down my career.’ The question, and possibly the answer, changes if the question is framed as, ‘What do I want to do for the second half of my career/work?’ As I read through the book, I was mentally examining some of my possible future options from a new perspective and with a different ‘grid’ to assess them. Very helpful! For me, it was the best contribution of this book to my mid-life cri….I mean, my re-evaluation of work and life.
2. Reframing Life: I found the ideas of life stages to be very intriguing. The concept that there were only two life-stages (child & adult) until the 20th century when four life-stages eventually emerged (child, teenager, adult, retiree) (4) put words to something I was vaguely aware of (i.e. I knew that historically ‘teenagers’ acted more like current ‘adults’ and ‘old’ was 50). Naming that, and suggesting that a new, less linear and multi-stage life will likely emerge beyond the ‘get educated, have a career, retire’ was a new way of thinking about the arc of life. It also helped to positively frame two newer sociological realities that are being recognized at present, but often framed in the negative:
a. Failure to Launch: It seems our society primarily speaks about young adults who live at home and haven’t started a career by their late 20’s in pejorative language. ‘Delayed adolescence’ is a term being used to address some of this reality, but the term is not positive. Perhaps the term ‘Juvenesence’ is a better term to describe a type of person of any age, but certainly today’s young adults that are flexible, wanting to keep their options open for longer, adaptable, who want to enjoy life, explore and think creatively (5). This extended period throughout their 20’s that looks different than previous generations might not be ‘irresponsible, lazy, or lacking motivation’…it might just be a newer stage of life that is getting worked out in real-time (with many of our children participating!).
b. Failure to Let Go: There is increasing discussion in our culture about the Boomer generation working longer, not retiring at 65, and maintaining positions of authority and power in various organizations. Again, this is often spoken about from a negative perspective—that they won’t let go; they refuse to empower the next generation; they are desperate to keep working because their identity is tied up in their career etc. From this perspective, retiring is viewed as something one ‘should’ do when they reach a certain age as opposed to something one ‘can’ do if they so desire. Some of this critique is likely fair, but Gratton and Scott offer another very reasonable suggestion: people are living longer; they have the physical capacity to work longer; and they may need to work longer due to their increased projected lifespan (to say nothing of the financial help they are giving to children who can’t afford a home without familial support). From this perspective, the one who continues to engage in meaningful work (and does not simply retire to a life of leisure) could be viewed positively, not negatively.
Since I have reached my word count limit, I will quickly note that I appreciated the authors recognition that this book is largely written to a relatively small global audience—that is, the middle-upper class of the Western world. As I read the various implications of a 100-year life I had a mild concern that this is another possible area where the very real gap between the lived experience of the rich and poor will only continue to widen. May the church continue to use their voice to advocate for the ‘least of these’ that often have little choice or options before them.
In summary, this was a very useful book that presented a different paradigm to the second half of my life and, in particular, a different set of questions as it relates to the ways I continue to live out my vocation through my work (and for how long). A very timely read!
(1) Lynda Gratton and Andrew Scott, The 100-Year Life: Living and Working in an Age of Longevity (London: Bloomsbury Publishing, 2020).
(2) Philippians 1.21
(3) If, in fact, we are more likely to be working into our mid-seventies as the authors suggest:
Lynda Gratton and Andrew Scott, The 100-Year Life: Living and Working in an Age of Longevity (London: Bloomsbury Publishing, 2020) 5.
(4) Lynda Gratton and Andrew Scott, The 100-Year Life: Living and Working in an Age of Longevity (London: Bloomsbury Publishing, 2020) 168.
(5) Lynda Gratton and Andrew Scott, The 100-Year Life: Living and Working in an Age of Longevity (London: Bloomsbury Publishing, 2020) 170-176.
About the Author
Scott Dickie
9 responses to “A New (and Longer) Way of Life”
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
You mentioned the “possibility” of a lack of “a compelling vision for growing old.” If you were to write that book: “How to have a compelling vision for long life while living in a fallen world” [with a subtitle that references the possibility of a diminished quality of life, memory loss, mounting medical costs (probably more of an American thing than a Canadian thing) and more], what would be your three main topics? And pretend that you are writing it to a well-differentiated #5 enneagram holder.
I do think that advocating for “the least of these” has to be more in the discussion. Especially for those who do live longer and have the capacity / health to be able to give themselves away with more agility.
Dang! If I understand your question correctly, Travis, this is a tough one!
Here’s my best response for today (with two bonus chapters for my supportive reading audience!):
1. Be present, attentive, and thankful for the little things.
2. Don’t retreat–do all that you can whatever your capacity is.
3. Invest in relationships–to pour into the next generation and also receive the joy of connection yourself.
4. Keep leaning on Jesus.
5. Maintain a vibrant (and somewhat cheeky) sense of humour.
Book launch coming soon!
Thanks for this helpful summary and your good thoughts on this book. You highlighted the authors’ reframing of the “failure to launch” phenomenon, which is something I hadn’t given much thought (since my kids are still about 10 years from that phase). If you had to articulate a set of “best practices” for mentoring 20-somethings toward independence and finding a career, without the pressure of being fully launched too early, what would you say?
Great question Kim.
Since I answered Travis’ question with some numbered statements…I’ll do the same here:
1. Relax…you’ve got some time. Now is the time to try things and experience life.
2. Learn yourself…your strengths, weaknesses, passions and the ways God has wired you.
3. Don’t freeze…keep moving forward and trying out various things…you won’t get much direction in your life sitting still and waiting for divine revelation…try things and know that it’s fine to move to something else.
4. Having said that, learn to work hard and persevere at things–don’t move on to something else because it’s hard.
5. Once you figure out what you want to do, prioritize the things in your life and go after it–learn to jump over, get around, or blast through the challenges and roadblocks that inevitably will come your way.
7. Hang out with other people that are being intentional about moving forward in life–you’re still influenced by your friends even though you’re out of highschool.
6. Whether you succeed or fail…whether it goes to plan or goes to pot…you are loved by me and God, and you will be ok.
Those are a few that come to mind at the moment…I suspect I missed some important things!
Hi Scott,
I really enjoyed your post and our conversation at dinner in D.C. I appreciate all the points you made and the re-frames you explored? Using your method of a positive re-frame, might it be that mid-life presents us with opportunities in part because of our restlessness, dissatisfaction, and re-evaluation of life? I think normalizing and working through it is part of the journey.
I’m also thinking that this might be a first-world problem and that maybe our loss of multi-generational living contributes to the discontent of the aging process, empty-nesting, and other troubles at mid-life. Do you have any thoughts on that?
Hi Jenny…great questions.
Yes to both! I do think it’s helpful and much more beneficial to see the mid-life moment as something to embrace as a moment to re-evaluate life and sharpen our focus/intention on investing in the next decades. Engaging in the moment/process will make us better whereas avoiding it will only be a missed opportunity.
Having said that, I do also think that much of our western ‘angst’ about purpose and questions like ‘what am I made for?’ is a privilege that the majority of the people in the world don’t have a luxury worry about–they are too busy being subsistence farmers so they can eat between harvests!
Not quite the same track as your second question regarding multi-generational living–too be honest I hadn’t thought of that dynamic, but it makes a lot of sense–how much less fulfilling would it be to age alone in a small apartment with the occasional call from your kids, compared to living with your kids and helping with the grandkids? I better make sure one of my kids has a basement suite for me!
Scott, I can relate to your skepticism around the appeal of living to a “ripe old age,” as I have had similar concerns. The move to thinking about the next 25 years is actually a helpful framing for me that I had not zeroed in on until you highlighted it- so thanks for that. Now if I can just figure out what I want that quarter of a century (!) to look like….
Hey Jenn,
I do think family history affects our vision for aging. We’ve got a nice tradition of dementia combined with long life (a bad combo!) in my family…so it’s not too compelling!
As it relates to our next quarter century of work(!), I do think an important aspect to consider (that I didn’t write about) is the way our work changes as we age. Rather than seeking to maintain ‘power and control’ as we age in our organizations, we could instead look to equip and empower the next generation and find joy in their success. This feels like a much more fulfilling (and Christian!) way to engage in our work as our wisdom grows and our capacity potentially declines.
Hope you get some good news on the new role you’re exploring!
I couldn’t agree more with you when you said “As I read the various implications of a 100-year life I had a mild concern that this is another possible area where the very real gap between the lived experience of the rich and poor will only continue to widen. May the church continue to use their voice to advocate for the ‘least of these’ that often have little choice or options before them.” There are so many have’s who are making choices for the have nots!” and they are suffering in what’s left over for them. It is mindboggling. However, there is something to be said that our mindset as we get older is equal opportunity and I’ve seen poor, little resources 100 year olds who are happy and have an amazing QOL, and more often it’s the have’s who cannot tolerate any sense of loss they cannot buy their way out of. I realize I say this from a postition of privelege. Thoughtful and thought provoking post Scott!