Leaders Helping others in the Sandbox
January 21, 15
MaryKate really hit on some major issues that I have faced years ago and even now. I can’t even begin to speak about how many areas that are so relevant to my life now and even in the work I am doing here at George Fox. One of the few areas I will touch on in this post is about that sand box. She made it simple enough to understand this dilemma that we face when we are children and when we grow up. She stated in Making Room for Leadership, “This book is about unpacking the message our bodies send as we play together in the grown-ups’ sandbox. It answers these questions: What is my body telling others? How can I become a player? If I’m already a player, how do I manage myself so that others are invited to play?”
At Biola University in a Organizational Behavior course I took I found out how I was really not working as a team player and that you can unknowingly be like a bully or just be so focused on a result that you might be sending the wrong message. “I was frustrated with other leaders who seemed oblivious to how they used their bodies to assert power plays during meetings. They would take up lots of space, and the rest of the group would be squashed against the sides of the sandbox.” I was put in a group on purpose with all women and we were told to build an aesthetically beautiful structure with leggos. My instructor did it on purpose with me. I love that guy. At the end of the building I was standing on the table trying to put the last piece of leggy on the top with people around just helping to hold it up. That test really opened up my eyes to how I used to run my construction company years ago. I learned so much from this, that as leaders we cant be so focused on the end result and not the people who are helping us do it. As MaryKate said we have to have more interpersonal abilities to lead affectively. She stated, “Though titles, followers, vision statements and goals may be markers of leadership, true leadership happens between the lines, in the interpersonal relational processes in social settings.”
I like some of the terms and the definitions in this reading and what they entail is how we should view our leadership. She used a Greek word, Kephale in this way; “Kephale can be defined either as the source of a stream or the head of a body. It can also refer to a scout who goes before an army to spy on the enemy.”
I think that this is right on point for leaders. Leadership is not just telling someone what to do it is being the first to do it if it for the good of those who follow us.
I have been studying concepts like shared leadership and one article that Caroline Ramsey gave me is so important to leaders. One of the concepts presented was the DAC model. This means Direction, Alignment and Commitment. It deals with shared leadership. MaryKate put it like this, “A leader helps give form and direction, but everyone, regardless of gender, age or amount of experience, has the right and responsibility to be part of the influencing process.”
I don’t like it when people just assume that you are ok with what they give you to do. And when we are leaders its important that we don’t take it for granted that people should share in the goals of the organization for them to enjoy following you or at least feel more apart of it.
There were more concepts and I could go on and on. But this is such a treasure of a read to me. And I want to be effective in how I lead and effect change. I don’t want to transform things for my benefit but in the hopes of benefiting and empowering others. “The ability to cause or prevent change can either benefit others or simply oneself.”
 MaryKate Morse. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence (Kindle Locations 78-80). Kindle Edition.
 MaryKate Morse. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence (Kindle Locations 97-98). Kindle Edition.
 MaryKate Morse. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence (Kindle Locations 160-161). Kindle Edition.
 MaryKate Morse. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence (Kindle Locations 230-231). Kindle Edition.
 MaryKate Morse. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence (Kindle Locations 257-258). Kindle Edition.
 MaryKate Morse. Making Room for Leadership: Power, Space and Influence (Kindle Locations 357-358). Kindle Edition.