{"id":41853,"date":"2025-08-26T20:18:30","date_gmt":"2025-08-27T03:18:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/?p=41853"},"modified":"2025-08-26T20:18:30","modified_gmt":"2025-08-27T03:18:30","slug":"cue-the-curtain-when-leadership-stops-being-an-act","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/cue-the-curtain-when-leadership-stops-being-an-act\/","title":{"rendered":"Cue the Curtain: When Leadership Stops Being an Act"},"content":{"rendered":"

The exercise at the end of <\/span>Humble Leadership<\/span><\/i> [1] was humbling\u2026 and not necessarily in the best way.<\/span><\/p>\n

I drew a circle with my initials at the center of the page. Then I drew circles around that center circle with initials for many people at church. As suggested, I added circles and initials for my family members and a few other people who impact my daily life in one way or another.<\/span><\/p>\n

I realized that, other than the two women at church who are in my \u201csupport group\u201d (for people who have or are working on doctorates), and a few people in the small group Bible study I lead, I can\u2019t say anyone is a Level 2 relationship. If they aren\u2019t in one of those two categories, no one in choir (I\u2019m the Music Director), no one on the Music Committee, and not even my pastor, are Level 2 relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n

I am in a Level 1 relationship with almost everyone at my church. Which explains why I have described it to my husband as, \u201cI feel like a function. I wave my arms on Thursday nights and Sunday mornings, and that\u2019s all they expect of me. I don\u2019t feel like I\u2019m a person in their eyes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

This resonates with what I\u2019ve described in my own work as the <\/span>Fragmented zone of leadership presence<\/b>\u2014where we end up performing from anxiety or self-protection. In that space, people see only our role or our function, not our personhood.<\/span><\/p>\n

I need to consider how to increase from Level 1 to Level 2 in at least a few relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n

Let\u2019s be honest; I know what that involves. I\u2019ve been intending to meet more people one-on-one at the local coffee shop more frequently. I\u2019ve been able to do it with a few people, but it\u2019s challenging to find the time (especially when I don\u2019t live in our church community; we\u2019re 30 minutes away).<\/span><\/p>\n

From Performance to Presence<\/b><\/h3>\n

As I read <\/span>Humble Leadership,<\/span><\/i> I was reminded of the concept of front stage\/back stage. In his book, <\/span>Leading Out of Who You Are<\/span><\/i>, Simon Walker describes the front stage as the place where \u201cour personal behaviour is a performance intended to ensure that the response [from the \u2018audience\u2019] is favourable.\u201d[2] He explains that through our daily front stage performance, \u201cwe get the attention of the audience we want, who will give us the kind of reception we seek, affirming our sense of identity.\u201d [3]<\/span><\/p>\n

He says our front stage performance is about impression management. I can see why that would be a Level 1 relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n

But the invitation is not to stay fragmented in that front-stage performance. It\u2019s to move toward <\/span>an Integrated presence<\/b>, where who I am backstage and who I am on the front stage align more closely. That\u2019s when trust grows, and when others begin to encounter me as a whole person, not just a role.<\/span><\/p>\n

Walker goes on to describe that if there are things we do of which we are proud, but we don\u2019t want to appear self-promoting, we keep them \u201cbackstage.\u201d Anyone we let into our backstage receives the privilege of getting to know us better. That sounds like a Level 2 or possibly 2.5 relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n

Johnny Parker also uses the same metaphor in his book, <\/span>Front Stage, Back Stage: External Success Requires Internal Health<\/span><\/i>. Like Walker, Parker explains that back stage is where we have our internal lives. Both authors describe how each stage affects the other. Parker writes, \u201cBefore I understood that my identity was secure in Christ, my backstage life was marinated in shame and false identity\u2026 Only when you understand your identity as one who is already loved by God, your true Father, and you receive quality love from others based on who you are, will your backstage enable you to perform on your frontstage with a full and open heart.\u201d [4]\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Leading With a Whole Identity<\/b><\/h3>\n

When I combined <\/span>Humble Leadership<\/span><\/i> with the front\/back stage idea, I began to see that Level 1 relationships are sustained mostly by my front stage. They\u2019re transactional, role-based, performance-driven. People applaud me for what I do (wave my arms, run a rehearsal), but not necessarily for who I am.<\/span><\/p>\n

To grow toward Level 2, I have to risk opening the curtain. I have to let a few people see backstage, not just my performance but my process, my doubts, my hopes, the parts of me that don\u2019t always \u201clook\u201d successful.<\/span><\/p>\n

This is where identity comes in. If my backstage identity is shaky\u2014if I\u2019m constantly hustling for approval while on the front stage\u2014then opening up back stage feels very risky. So I remind myself of what Parker also writes: that my identity is already secure in Christ; I can risk being known. As Paul also reminds us, \u201cYour life is now hidden with Christ in God\u201d (Colossians 3:3). That hiddenness is not about secrecy, but security. It liberates me to show up humbly, as myself, not just as my role.<\/span><\/p>\n

In my article, \u201cWho Are You?\u201d I describe what I call the \u201c3 Zones of Leadership Presence.\u201d When we lead from our belovedness in Christ, we lead from the <\/span>Coherent zone of presence<\/b>. In that place, my backstage and front stage become one whole story. In this space, leadership is not performance; it\u2019s presence. [5]<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Humble Leadership thrives in exactly that kind of space: open, trusting, personized relationships. Moving from Level 1 to Level 2 is less about grand gestures and more about simple, vulnerable acts: asking a real question, sharing a personal story, showing up at the coffee shop not as \u201cthe choir director\u201d but simply as Debbie.<\/span><\/p>\n

And maybe that\u2019s the point. Leadership isn\u2019t about playing the perfect front stage role or living perpetually backstage. It\u2019s about integrating the two\u2014living out of a whole, secure identity in Christ, and inviting others into relationships where we are both fully seen and fully safe.<\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s where trust grows. That\u2019s where community deepens. That\u2019s where leadership becomes not just a function, but a shared journey toward something \u201cnew and better.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

At the end of the day, <\/span>Humble Leadership<\/span><\/i> is about more than managing roles or functions.<\/span> It\u2019s about moving beyond fragmented performance into integrated, coherent presence.<\/b> When our backstage identity in Christ is secure, our front stage becomes trustworthy, and our relationships move from transactional to transformational. That\u2019s when leadership stops being a role we play and becomes a life we share.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

========<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

1 – Edgar H. Schein and Peter A. Schein, <\/span>Humble Leadership; The Power of Relationships, Openness, and Trust<\/span><\/i>, 2nd ed. (Oakland, CA: Barrett-Koehler, 2023), 137.<\/span><\/p>\n

2 – Simon P. Walker, <\/span>Leading Out of Who You Are; Discovering the Secret of Undefended Leadership<\/span><\/i> (Carlisle, UK: Piquant, 2008), 24.<\/span><\/p>\n

3 – Walker, 24.<\/span><\/p>\n

4 – Johnny Parker, <\/span>Front Stage, Back Stage; External Success Requires Internal Health<\/span><\/i> (Virginia: AACC, 2024), 40-41.<\/span><\/p>\n

5 – Deborah Owen, \u201cWho Are You? The Hidden Operating System That Shapes How You Live and Lead,\u201d <\/span>Rooted & Rising<\/span><\/i> (Substack), Aug. 20, 2025. <\/span>https:\/\/debbieowen.substack.com\/p\/who-are-you<\/span><\/a>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The exercise at the end of Humble Leadership [1] was humbling\u2026 and not necessarily in the best way. I drew a circle with my initials at the center of the page. Then I drew circles around that center circle with initials for many people at church. As suggested, I added circles and initials for my […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":197,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[2967,3217],"class_list":["post-41853","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dlgp03","tag-schein","cohort-dlgp03"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41853","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/197"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=41853"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41853\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":41856,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41853\/revisions\/41856"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=41853"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=41853"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=41853"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}