I was recently presented with an opportunity to define leadership from my cohort colleague, Robert. Here’s how I chose to do so:<\/p>\n
Leadership defines what today is and influences others toward what tomorrow will be. Good leadership does so while not losing one\u2019s own soul.<\/em><\/p>\n It’s a work in progress and open to critique.<\/p>\n In Clear Thinking<\/em>, Shane Parrish provides a guide to cultivating thinking and decisions that contribute toward goals. [1] Early in the book, I came across this quote from Jeff Bezos:<\/p>\n “Complaining is not a strategy. You have to work with the world as you find it, not as you would have it be.” [2]<\/p><\/blockquote>\n This caught my eye for a couple of reasons. It speaks to the hard realities of leadership right here, right now, and it also begs the question: “What about vision and creating something different for tomorrow?”<\/p>\n Because of this, I was curious to explore the concepts in Parrish’s work through the lenses of today’s reality, tomorrow’s possibility, and safeguarding our souls on the journey between.<\/p>\n Bezos’ quote reminds us that we must function within the world in a manner that is consistent with what is real. We have a word for thinking about a situation as anything other than what it actually is: delusion.<\/p>\n It is the leader’s responsibility to dispel delusions. This includes delusions of the world, people, and our minds and how they work, as demonstrated by Hans Rosling [3], Daniel Kahneman [4], and David Rock. [5]<\/p>\n However, for the good leader, it also includes delusions about identity and purpose, as described by Simon Walker [6] and Jules Glanzer. [7]<\/p>\n Parrish describes some emotional and behavioral “defaults” we operate with. [8] I have added my thoughts on where we may experience delusion in these areas, including examples from others.<\/p>\n To dispel these delusions, Parrish outlines how leaders can build strength through self-accountability, self-knowledge, self-control, and self-confidence, followed by how they can manage weaknesses through familiarization, safeguards, and handling mistakes. [13]<\/p>\n Friedman describes this as being “well-differentiated.” [14] The well-differentiated leader is positioned to describe realities without it being a threat to their own sense of identity.<\/p>\n In Parrish’s view, the path to getting what you want from the world lies in identifying the reality of how the world works and aligning yourself with it. [15] For tomorrow to be different, something must happen in today’s reality that would cause it to be different. A leader is responsible for defining a problem and its root cause and then working toward something different. [16]<\/p>\n Whether the situation we find ourselves in is of our own doing or that of others makes no difference. ‘Fault’ and ‘responsibility’ are not the same thing. Parrish writes, “Just because something happened that was outside of your control doesn’t mean it’s not your responsibility to deal with it the best you can.” [17]<\/p>\n Another fact of reality is that every situation we find ourselves in results from a combination of choices we have made and choices others have made. When tempted to blame, complain, or defend (BCD), [18] a good leader must reject these options and instead take ownership of regulating their own emotion, ego, social response, and tendency toward inertia. Betsy de Thierry describes this in practical detail in her recent blog post. [19]<\/p>\n Whatever situation they find themselves in, leaders have the responsibility\u2013the ability to respond\u2013to envision a different future and inspire others toward it.<\/p>\n We may be tempted to be cautious about the future, which I think is wise. However, caution cannot last indefinitely. The leader must be decisive.<\/p>\n Parrish provides a helpful framework for decisions based on the severity of their consequences and their potential to be reversed. [20] The less impactful the consequences, the greater the capacity to absorb the mistake. Mistakes are the building blocks of learning and a key function of dispelling delusions about reality. [21]<\/p>\n Leadership involves defining reality and setting a path forward. However, bad leaders chart a path forward that is harmful to others or themselves. What makes leadership good is the quality of that future and how we arrive there.<\/p>\n “Good judgment is, above all else, having wisdom,” writes Parrish. [22] He describes wisdom not simply as knowing how to get what you want but as knowing what is worth getting<\/em>. [23]<\/p>\n Jesus asks, “What does it profit a man to gain the whole world and forfeit his soul? For what can a man give in return for his soul?” (Mark 8:36-37)<\/p>\n The vision of the future needs to be different but also better for those involved. It should shepherd their souls.<\/p>\n What is that future vision? Is it running the hedonic treadmill, chasing pleasure after pleasure? [24] Research, scripture, and life experience testify that this is not the path to a good life. [25]<\/p>\n Is it driven by the defaults and delusions of our emotions, ego, social anxieties, and fear of change, or is there a better, wiser source that preserves our souls?<\/p>\n Jesus describes the “fruit that abides,” the change that lasts:<\/p>\n “I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another.” The wisdom of Jesus points us toward love for one another.<\/p>\n Love is not cheap. In fact, it is the most costly thing. Love does not ignore today’s reality, nor does it abdicate its responsibility to lead into the future. It is willing to give of itself so that others may live, and, in return, the giver receives new life themselves.<\/p>\n This is leading the Jesus way.<\/p>\n [1] Shane Parrish, Clear Thinking: Turning Ordinary Moments into Extraordinary Results<\/em> (New York, NY: Portfolio\/Penguin, 2023).<\/p>\n [2] Parrish, 44.<\/p>\n [3] Hans Rosling, Ola Rosling, and Anna Rosling R\u00f6nnlund, Factfulness: Ten Reasons We\u2019re Wrong About the World–and Why Things Are Better Than You Think<\/em>, First edition (New York: Flatiron Books, 2018).<\/p>\n [4] Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow<\/em>, First paperback edition, Psychology\/Economics (New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2013).<\/p>\n [5] David Rock, Your Brain at Work, Revised and Updated: Strategies for Overcoming Distraction, Regaining Focus, and Working Smarter All Day Long<\/em>, 1st ed (New York, NY: HarperCollins Publishers, 2020).<\/p>\n [6] Simon Walker, Leading out of Who You Are<\/em>, The Undefended Leader 1 (Carlisle, United Kingdom: Piquant Editions, 2007).<\/p>\n [7] Jules Glanzer, Sound of Leadership: Kingdom Notes to Fine Tune Your Life and Influence<\/em>\u00a0(Plano, TX, USA: Invite Press, 2023).<\/p>\n [8] Parrish, 10-11.<\/p>\n [9] Bobby Duffy, Why We\u2019re Wrong About Nearly Everything: A Theory of Human Misunderstanding<\/em>, First (New York, NY: Basic Books, 2019), 225.<\/p>\n [10] Jules Glanzer, Sound of Leadership: Kingdom Notes to Fine Tune Your Life and Influence<\/em>\u00a0(Plano, TX, USA: Invite Press, 2023), 125-128.<\/p>\n [11] Parrish, 54.<\/p>\n [12] Eve Poole, Leadersmithing: An Apprenticeship Approach to Making Great Leaders<\/em>\u00a0(New York: Bloomsbury Business, 2017)., 14-15<\/p>\n [13] Parrish, 41, 93-118.<\/p>\n [14] Edwin H. Friedman, A Failure of Nerve, Revised Edition: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix, Revised Edition<\/em>\u00a0(La Vergne: Church Publishing Incorporated, 2017), 15.<\/p>\n [15] Parrish, 246.<\/p>\n [16] Parrish, 128.<\/p>\n [17] Parrish, 48.<\/p>\n [18] Glanzer, 110.<\/p>\n [19] Betsy de Thierry, \u201cTaking Responsibility in a Blaming Culture,\u201d April 10, 2025, https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/taking-responsibility-in-a-blaming-culture\/<\/a>.<\/p>\n [20] Parrish, 115.<\/p>\n [21] Parrish, 185.<\/p>\n [22] Parrish, 243.<\/p>\n [23] Parrish, 230 & 232.<\/p>\n [24] Parrish, 226.<\/p>\n [25] Daniel Mochon, Michael I. Norton, and Dan Ariely, \u201cGetting Off the Hedonic Treadmill, One Step at a Time: The Impact of Regular Religious Practice and Exercise on Well-Being,\u201d Journal of Economic Psychology<\/em> 29, no. 5 (November 2008): 632\u201342, https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1016\/j.joep.2007.10.004<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I was recently presented with an opportunity to define leadership from my cohort colleague, Robert. Here’s how I chose to do so: Leadership defines what today is and influences others toward what tomorrow will be. Good leadership does so while not losing one\u2019s own soul. It’s a work in progress and open to critique. In […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":214,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[3397,1692],"class_list":["post-41636","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dlgp04","tag-parrish","cohort-dlgp04"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41636","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/214"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=41636"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41636\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":41755,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/41636\/revisions\/41755"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=41636"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=41636"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=41636"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}The Reality of Today<\/h2>\n
Defaults and Delusions<\/h3>\n
\n
The Possibility of Tomorrow<\/h2>\n
Response-ability<\/h3>\n
Mistakes as learning<\/h3>\n
Keeping the Soul<\/h2>\n
Fruit that Abides<\/h3>\n
\nJohn 15:16-17<\/p><\/blockquote>\nNotes<\/h1>\n