In a spiritual direction session, the only posture that allows me to remain open to the Spirit and the person seeking direction is a posture of love, a visceral \u2018willing the good\u2019 toward the person in front of me. That may sound obvious, but for a chronic self-preservationist like myself, it is one of the most challenging spiritual disciplines I practice. Offering spiritual direction is one of the few times in my life that I get to take a break from constantly mulling over how I will improve myself and my circumstances. It allows my nervous system a momentary reprieve from its natural (or maybe demanded) state of fight or flight. It\u2019s also one of the few times in life that I do not need to be prepared with answers. In training for spiritual direction, this is one of the scariest parts – Complete and utter dependence on the Spirit to flow through me with silence or the questions that want to be asked, questions that are not directive or that I already know the answers to, just complete acceptance – an open posture, and non-judgmental, loving curiosity.<\/p>\n
It seems simple enough, but think about how many times in a day or week or year you actually find yourself on the other side of someone with this posture towards us. Even those who love us unconditionally have an agenda for their words towards us. We can\u2019t help it. We think we know what is best, and if we can just get that information into the mind of the person we are talking to, then they will be better off.
\nI mentioned earlier that I am a chronic self-preservationist. Add to that an addiction for giving unsolicited advice, and you have the exact opposite of a decent spiritual director. But I have learned some listening skills, and those skills, when put into practice, are changing me. Better yet, somehow, through God\u2019s grace, my transformation is allowing healing to happen in others.
\nCreating brave spaces where people can touch the parts of themselves that have been in exile, and dare to ask the questions that are typically off-limits has prompted a few existential questions of my own.<\/p>\n
Any good evangelical would probably say no. \u201cThe purpose of life is to worship God, not turn your life into a self-help project.\u201d But what I mean by human transformation is very specific. That is, transformation into a person defined by love. A person through which God\u2019s love flows completely. Most major religions agree on this, at least at the mystical level. This requires more fleshing out than I have word-count for but just go with me on this for a minute. If the purpose of life is to be transformed into a person defined by love and all of creation is being prepared to host the indwelling presence of God, how do we transform? Spiritual formation literature would say that we only transform by being in the presence of love and allowing it to change us. Or put in other words, Grace. So is there anything we can do? Yes, we can become aware of this transformative Presence and open ourselves to it. How? Short answer, spiritual practices (disciplines).<\/p>\n
What I am not saying:<\/strong> spiritual practices transform us into love.<\/p>\n What I am saying:<\/strong> spiritual practices make space for us to experience the presence of love which transforms us into love.<\/p>\n One of those spiritual practices is spiritual direction. In spiritual direction, another person is facilitating that meeting between us and the presence of God through honesty, vulnerability, and safety. It is a sacred space that is available at every moment, but for some reason is frustratingly difficult to become aware of on our own. Spiritual direction is a three-way conversation between the director, the directee, and the Spirit. It\u2019s mostly a time of self-discovery. Much like threshold concepts, what is discovered in this space can\u2019t be passed through information. The wisdom of Christ is already inside a person, we just need someone to help facilitate it out of us. That self-discovery causes a major shift in perspective that is sticky because it came from within. Many times people become aware of God\u2019s presence retroactively in situations they had not realized before. This rewrites old stories of trauma and shame revealing a completely new perspective that brings some of those interior exiles home.<\/p>\n I\u2019m not sure what this would look like at an organizational level. I think people have been trying to figure out what to do with people becoming like Jesus in a group of more than 150 for the last 2,000 years. As I read Camacho, I see servant and transformational leadership theory at work in his FLOW framework. I see the multiplication efforts in coaching leaders to coach leaders. I see the purpose that is found in making space for others to self-discover their gifts and passions. And I see the need for people to be set free from the tyranny of mediocrity with calling and purpose. I think coaching can be a good format for becoming. I think we can call it whatever we want and package it in whatever way is helpful to articulate. I think true transformation into people defined by love comes through feeling seen, heard, and known. Anyway we can train people to facilitate that for others Is a good thing.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n Bibliography<\/strong><\/p>\n Booram, Beth A., and David Booram. When Faith Becomes Sight: Opening Your Eyes to God\u2019s Presence All Around You.<\/em> Downers Grove, IL: IVP Books, 2019.<\/p>\n Camacho, Tom. Mining for Gold: Developing Kingdom Leaders Through Coaching.<\/em> Downers Grove, IL: IVP Books, 2019.<\/p>\n Greenleaf, Robert K. Servant Leadership: A Journey into the Nature of Legitimate Power and Greatness.<\/em> New York: Paulist Press, 1977.<\/p>\n Millis, Dianne. Conversations: The Sacred Art\u2014Practicing Presence in an Age of Distraction.<\/em> Woodstock, VT: SkyLight Paths, 2013.<\/p>\n Burns, James MacGregor. Leadership.<\/em> New York: Harper & Row, 1978.<\/p>\n Bass, Bernard M. Leadership and Performance Beyond Expectations.<\/em> New York: Free Press, 1985.<\/p>\n 1 Corinthians 13:2-3 \u2013 Love as the highest virtue<\/em><\/p>\n Colossians 3:14 \u2013 Love as the defining characteristic of maturity<\/em><\/p>\n 1 John 4:7-8 \u2013 God\u2019s nature is love, and we reflect Him<\/em><\/p>\n 2 Corinthians 3:18 \u2013 Transformation into God’s image<\/em><\/p>\n Matthew 22:36-40 \u2013 Jesus’ greatest commandments: Love God, Love others<\/em><\/p>\n John 13:34-35 \u2013 Love is the defining trait of Christ\u2019s disciples<\/em><\/p>\n Galatians 5:22-23 \u2013 Love as the fruit of the Spirit<\/em><\/p>\n Ephesians 5:1-2 \u2013 Imitating Christ by walking in love<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In a spiritual direction session, the only posture that allows me to remain open to the Spirit and the person seeking direction is a posture of love, a visceral \u2018willing the good\u2019 toward the person in front of me. 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