{"id":37504,"date":"2024-04-15T07:10:51","date_gmt":"2024-04-15T14:10:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/?p=37504"},"modified":"2024-04-15T07:10:51","modified_gmt":"2024-04-15T14:10:51","slug":"knowing-your-vision","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/knowing-your-vision\/","title":{"rendered":"Knowing Your Vision"},"content":{"rendered":"

I have been married for nearly twenty-six years and have four beautiful children.\u00a0 Just over thirteen years ago, I sat down and wrote out a vision. I started it As a follower of Christ \u00a0Jesus, I want to have my family impact the world in a way that brings glory and honor to Christ, I want the world to see Christ through my family (Phil. 2:12-18).<\/em>\u00a0 I then proceeded to write how I was going to accomplish this vision which included ways to love and lead my wife and love and lead my children.\u00a0 I thought about this vision statement while reading to Shane Parrish\u2019s book Clear Thinking<\/em> and listening to two podcasts on which he appeared.[1]<\/a><\/p>\n

In his book, Parrish discusses how we can spend time and energy making big decisions like where to go to college, who to marry, etc., but that it is really the small day to day, moment by moment decisions we make that have the larger impact.\u00a0 For example, If I choose to start a doctoral program (a pretty big decision) but decide to sleep in on Monday mornings and miss the weekly meetings with Dr. Clark and the cohort, I am not going to succeed in the program.\u00a0 Parrish talks about how we have four defaults that we rely on to engage in decision making.[2]<\/a> These defaults are similar to Kahneman\u2019s System 1 Thinking[3]<\/a>\u00a0 The defaults Parrish describes are<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. The emotion default: we tend to respond to feelings rather than reasons and facts (I don\u2019t feel like getting up).<\/li>\n
  2. The ego default: we tend to react to anything that threatens our sense of self-worth or our position in a group hierarchy (I\u2019m getting a doctoral degree so my students and co-workers better respect me).<\/li>\n
  3. The social default: we tend to conform to the norms of our larger social group (no one else is wearing a mask or social distancing, I don\u2019t want to look weird).<\/li>\n
  4. The inertia default: we\u2019re habit forming and comfort seeking.\u00a0 We tend to resist change, and to prefer ideas, processes, and environments that are familiar (I cannot comply with this new policy, it does not make sense, I do not like it, and it is too hard to change what I have been doing for years).[4]<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    When we rely on these defaults Parrish suggests we don\u2019t always make the best judgements.\u00a0 He states \u201cMost errors in judgement happen when we don\u2019t know we\u2019re supposed to be exercising judgement.\u00a0 They happen because our subconscious is driving our behavior and cutting us out of the process of determining what we should do.\u201d[5]<\/a>\u00a0 We need to engage in Kahneman\u2019s System 2 Thinking or as David Rock might suggest, bring the correct actor\u2019s up onto the stage.[6]<\/a>\u00a0 Parrish says that we do this by implementing safeguards that allow good decision making to be the \u201cpath of least resistance.\u201d[7]<\/a> Throughout the book Parrish discusses how to implement safeguards at each step of the decision making process.\"\"<\/a>\u00a0 Including \u201cfail-safe\u201d measure that are put into place once a decision is made.[8]<\/a><\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n

    Parrish says that good decision making comes down to two things: \u201cKnowing how to get what you want\u201d and \u201cKnowing what\u2019s worth wanting.\u201d[9]<\/a>\u00a0 For me, what\u2019s worth wanting relates back to my vision, my focus was not on having\u00a0the best job or the nicest house.\u00a0 I wanted a family who loved the Lord and enjoyed spending time with one another. \u00a0My plans for accomplishing this were not perfect, but my wife and I invested time and energy into our marriage and into each child.\u00a0 I took jobs that were not always the highest paying, but the schedule\u00a0allowed me to be home almost every evening so that we could have dinner together as a family.\u00a0 At the dinner table we did a daily devotional and spent time sharing our ups and downs of the day and prayer requests.\u00a0 We had family game nights and family camping trips, most of which seemed to involve camping in the rain.\u00a0 My wife and I invested in our marriage by having some date nights and weekends away. \u00a0We made spending time with God and with one another a priority. In church yesterday I was reminded of two passages in the Bible. \u201cUnless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain\u201d, and \u201cBut each one should be careful how he builds. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.\u00a0 If any man builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay, or straw, his work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light.\u00a0 It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man\u2019s work.\u201d[10]<\/a> \u00a0While I know Paul is talking about the church, I feel that this applies to building my family.\u00a0 I believe that my wife and I have laid a solid foundation focusing and relying on Jesus.\u00a0 I believe that we have used the right building materials to accomplish my vision. I believe that with God\u2019s grace our family does bring glory and honor to Christ, and I believe that the world does see Christ reflected in us.<\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n

    [1]<\/a> Parrish, Clear Thinking, (New York, NY: Latticework Publishing, 2023)<\/em>; Passmore and Felix, \u00a0\u201cShane Parrish: Clear Thinking in Everyday Life,\u201d \u00a0November 23, 2023, in Rational Remind<\/em>, produced by PWL Capital, podcast.\u00a0 YouTube, 1:03:28, Shttps:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=kspEzVKvWHs<\/a>; Finck, \u201cClear Thinking with Shane Parrish (Tip580),\u201d\u00a0 October 5, 2023, in We Study Billionaires<\/em>, produced by The Investors Podcast Network, podcast, YouTube, 55:23, https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=U9SY_M5CXTo<\/a>.<\/p>\n

    [2]<\/a> Parrish, 10.<\/p>\n

    [3]<\/a> Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow<\/em>, (Canada: Anchor Canada, 2013), 20-21.<\/p>\n

    [4]<\/a> Parrish, 10-11.<\/p>\n

    [5]<\/a> Parrish, 245.<\/p>\n

    [6]<\/a> Kahneman, 14; Rock, Your Brain at Work: Strategies for Overcoming Distraction, Regaining Focus, and Working Smarter All Day Long, <\/em>(New York, NY: Harper Collings, 2009), 14<\/p>\n

    [7]<\/a> Parrish, 246.<\/p>\n

    [8]<\/a> Parrish, 204.<\/p>\n

    [9]<\/a> Parrish, 221.<\/p>\n

    [10]<\/a> Psalm 127:1; I Corinthians 3:10b-13.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    I have been married for nearly twenty-six years and have four beautiful children.\u00a0 Just over thirteen years ago, I sat down and wrote out a vision. I started it As a follower of Christ \u00a0Jesus, I want to have my family impact the world in a way that brings glory and honor to Christ, I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":200,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[2967,1692],"class_list":["post-37504","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dlgp03","tag-parrish","cohort-dlgp03"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37504","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/200"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=37504"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37504\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":37508,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37504\/revisions\/37508"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=37504"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=37504"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=37504"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}