{"id":36742,"date":"2024-03-15T07:55:16","date_gmt":"2024-03-15T14:55:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/?p=36742"},"modified":"2024-03-15T07:55:16","modified_gmt":"2024-03-15T14:55:16","slug":"more-blessed-to-give-when-you-first-receive","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/more-blessed-to-give-when-you-first-receive\/","title":{"rendered":"More Blessed to Give When You First Receive"},"content":{"rendered":"

Self-assessments, personality tests, and self-help methods are things I like to explore. I enjoy learning, especially new theories and trends. I go through phases, learning what I can, sharing with those who may seem interested, and finally applying what is relevant before I move on to a new subject. As I started to read Leading Out of Who You Are: Discovering the Secret of Undefended Leadership <\/em>by Simon Walker, I knew I was going to like the book. It addresses leadership as being dynamics between \u201ctrust\u201d and \u201cpower.\u201d Walker states that the internal character of a leader is what comes out in their leadership style. An \u201cundefended leader\u201d is someone who has the liberty to be their authentic self from the inside out.[1]<\/a> According to the book, we all wrestle with self-doubt. To cope with this self-doubt, we develop ways of defending ourselves in childhood.[2]<\/a> Walker explains four different leadership defense mechanisms that are developed in childhood. These are called \u201cleadership egos.\u201d The shaping, defining, adapting, and defending leadership egos are shaped primarily through trust or a lack of trust concerning self and others.[3]<\/a><\/p>\n

I identify most with the \u201cThe Shaping Ego.\u201d This ego develops a high level of trust in oneself and others. Walker describes this leadership ego as \u201coverconfidence and paternalism.\u201d[4]<\/a> My shaping ego wants to fight back and re-frame this as \u201cself-assurance and assertiveness.\u201d As I read the book, I tried to learn from the insights and suggestions specific to this leadership ego.<\/p>\n

Chapter Twelve, The Freedom to Give: Cultivating Undefended Leadership<\/em>, particularly caught my attention.[5]<\/a> The chapter starts with a quote by Robert Greenleaf, the founder of the \u201cServant Leadership Theory.\u201d I have been a servant leadership advocate for years. It is a big part of my NPO for this doctoral program. I was intrigued when Walker suggested that Servant Leadership, while having validity, needs to be further examined when addressing those in social leadership\u2014people like me, who advocate for and embrace servant leadership. Walker identified four characteristics that emerge when dealing with social leaders:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Difficulty relinquishing the role as \u201cvolunteer.\u201d[6]<\/a><\/li>\n
  2. Need for affirmation and approval.[7]<\/a><\/li>\n
  3. The inability to be served.[8]<\/a><\/li>\n
  4. Resentment of what has been given.[9]<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    He goes on to say,<\/p>\n

    \n

    A significant percentage of people in social leadership, motivated by [Greenleaf\u2019s] vision of servant leadership, may fail to find [love and grace to serve others] within themselves and instead run dry. So, they resort to constructing other kinds of collusion that secure them other, emotional rewards for their work. The danger in this is that not only will they end up exhausted and bitter but their followers will end up hurt.[10]<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

    I have seen this in social leaders and my own life. Working as a nurse practitioner and living cross-culturally, I am surrounded by service-driven people. Early on in both healthcare and humanitarian work, I saw that just because people \u201cserve\u201d for a profession does not mean they are doing it for altruistic motivations. It is also possible what was started with noble intentions was continued in one\u2019s strength and therefore \u201cran out.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Society affirms these \u201csacrificial careers.\u201d Healthcare workers are praised for dealing with trauma, body fluid, and \u201clife and death\u201d situations, while working holidays, weekends, and nightshift. Cross-cultural workers are placed on pedestals for doing what others would not want to do\u2014living away from home, giving up the luxuries of the developed world (the internet is the problem I am currently dealing with!), and regularly battling parasites and critters. All too often the attention on the \u201csacrifices\u201d becomes one\u2019s identity, affirmation, and motivation to continue. Those forgotten are the ones receiving the care and service\u2014the patients and the recipients of aid. They have become a means of self-fulfillment for those social leaders. This is not always true of everyone all the time. But it is a reality, often. It is a reality for me; I must check my motivations constantly. What do we do with this?<\/p>\n

    Walker suggests that we cannot give without first receiving. When we have been the recipients of generosity, more specifically Divine generosity, we can then give generously. God gives from an endless supply and thus, in relationship with him, we can receive from Him and allow that outflow in our own lives.[11]<\/a> I believe the fundamental issues of leadership go back to our relationship with God. Am I trusting in the omnipotent God to give me everything I need? It is through my trust in Him, that I can receive what He offers without limits.<\/p>\n

    How can this outflow into servant leadership? Robert Greenleaf, referring to servant leadership, gives a way to measure if this servant leadership model is working,<\/p>\n

    The best test, and difficult to administer, is: do those served grow as persons; do they, while being served<\/em>, become healthier, wiser, freer, more autonomous, more likely themselves to become servants? And what is the effect on the least privileged in society; will they benefit, or at least, not be further deprived?[12]<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

    Perhaps the servant-leader must first ask this of himself or herself: Before I serve and while I am serving, am I becoming healthier, wiser, freer, and more autonomous (for Christians, more reliant) through the grace and love of the omniscient God? It is then that this can outflow into one\u2019s leadership as a servant-leader and an undefended leader.<\/p>\n

    Acts 20:35 (ESV), \u201cIn all things\u00a0I have shown you that\u00a0by working hard in this way we must\u00a0help the weak and\u00a0remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said,\u00a0\u2018It is more blessed\u00a0to give than to receive.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

    __________________________________________<\/p>\n

    [1]<\/a> Simon P Walker, \u201cLeading out of Who You Are,\u201d 2016, 22.<\/p>\n

    [2]<\/a> Ibid., 27-28.<\/p>\n

    [3]<\/a> Ibid.,135.<\/p>\n

    [4]<\/a> Ibid., 80.<\/p>\n

    [5]<\/a> Ibid., 144.<\/p>\n

    [6]<\/a> Ibid, 146.<\/p>\n

    [7]<\/a> Ibid, 146.<\/p>\n

    [8]<\/a> Ibid., 147.<\/p>\n

    [9]<\/a> Ibid., 147.<\/p>\n

    [10]<\/a> Ibid., 147-148.<\/p>\n

    [11]<\/a> Ibid., 151.<\/p>\n

    [12]<\/a> Robert K. Greenleaf, The Servant as Leader<\/em>, Rev. Ed. (Westfield, IN: Greenleaf Center for Servant Leadership, 1973), 7.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Self-assessments, personality tests, and self-help methods are things I like to explore. I enjoy learning, especially new theories and trends. I go through phases, learning what I can, sharing with those who may seem interested, and finally applying what is relevant before I move on to a new subject. As I started to read Leading […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":206,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[2967,1718],"class_list":["post-36742","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dlgp03","tag-walker","cohort-dlgp03"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/36742","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/206"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=36742"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/36742\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":36743,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/36742\/revisions\/36743"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=36742"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=36742"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=36742"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}