Thirty years ago, I was promoted to be the CEO of a seafood distribution company based out of Reno, Nevada. It was a big promotion and one I was ready to take on. There was a corporate umbrella over it, which owned 3 other branches over two states. There was one man who owned the corporation.<\/p>\n
There was a window in my new office that overlooked the warehouse and production facility, which, aside from 5 people in the office, was where most of the employees were. He had me stand up, and he pointed to all the people running around and told me that every decision I made would affect those people and that I alone would be responsible for getting food on their table every night. That made me swallow hard. But then he had me sit down, looked me in the eye, and said, \u201cWhatever decision you make, I will back you 100%. If I don\u2019t like your decision, I will never correct you in front of your employees, but I will pull you aside and tell you what I would have done differently. And he did \u2013 several times, but I learned from them.<\/p>\n
The beauty of his last statement was that it immediately took the fear out of making decisions. I had to go with what I felt was right at that time, and I did well. Sales took off, and new customers came in. We hired several more people to keep up with the demand. That statement gave me freedom.<\/p>\n
Friedman writes, \u201cA leader needs the capacity not only to accept the solitariness that comes with the territory, but also to come to love it.\u201d[1]<\/a> That responsibility of putting dinner on everyone\u2019s table was real, but because I had the freedom to make decisions without fear, it was easy to love what I was doing. But I believe one of the reasons that I loved it is that I was able to take that same sense of \u201cfearless decision making\u201d and pass it on to the truck drivers, warehouse workers, my admin assistant, and salespeople to just make a decision and do what you think is the right thing. Friedman talks of \u201cemotional systems\u201d: \u201cThe term emotional system refers to any group of people who have developed interdependencies to the point where the resulting system through which they are connected (administratively, physically, or emotionally) has evolved its own principles of organization.\u201d[2]<\/a> We all depended on each other and had a general feeling that from the drivers all the way up to my position, we were all in it together.<\/p>\n This company was the \u201cnew kid in town\u201d that had only been open a few years. The competition had all been there for decades. Friedman talks of adaptation, and that was a daily occurrence. How do we react to the other company offering Saturday deliveries, or do we want to get into a price war on $35.00 a lb. lobster tails? The book states, \u201cPrimitive organisms remain primitive; they do not evolve because of the narrowness of their capacity to adapt to changes in their environment.\u201d[3]<\/a> We didn\u2019t have that luxury. We either needed to figure out how to meet and beat the competition or fold up shop and move back to L.A.<\/p>\n I am sharing all of this with you for two reasons. First, I think that the adaptations, fear, and responsibilities that I went through parallel a lot of what the book discusses. \u00a0I was proud of what I had accomplished over those two years. I would like to think that my leadership decisions were on par with the good practices of this book. We built a good, strong company as a team and a family.<\/p>\n BUT\u2026 (you know this was coming), there was a dark side to this.\u00a0 What I didn\u2019t know was that the owner was \u201ccooking the books\u201d in one of the other offices, and one day, he called me and asked me to do the same thing (there is a lot more to this that I won\u2019t get into in this space). Anyway, every bone in my body told me to say no. My mind was racing with red flags, but I was not strong enough. \u00a0 Friedman writes: \u201cThe capacity to take responsibility for one\u2019s own being and destiny requires integrity, which in this context means not only honesty but being \u201cput together well.\u201d[4]<\/a> I knew who I was and wanted to be, but I felt like he was my boss and needed to obey; I guess I wasn\u2019t put together that well then. I was a baby Christian during this period. Long story short, I got the blame and took the fall for him. I will not blame him. I knew better and should have never let that start; I got arrested and took a long fall. I have told others many times \u2013 that period of my life was the very best thing that could have happened to me. For 3 years, I was able to study the Word of God, and it has made me into the man I am today. Integrity is everything in leadership. I am grateful for the lesson I was given.<\/p>\n [1]<\/a> Edwin H. Friedman. A Failure of Nerve<\/em> (New York: Church Publishing, 2017), 41-42<\/p>\n