{"id":31817,"date":"2023-03-14T05:37:05","date_gmt":"2023-03-14T12:37:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/?p=31817"},"modified":"2023-03-15T09:12:28","modified_gmt":"2023-03-15T16:12:28","slug":"cognitive-dissonance-inherent-in-the-gospel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/cognitive-dissonance-inherent-in-the-gospel\/","title":{"rendered":"Cognitive Dissonance Inherent in the Gospel"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cA leader leads people from where they currently are to another place, which at first is unknown to them and can\u00a0only be imagined.\u201d[1]<\/a><\/p>\n

Moses. Hudson Taylor. Abraham Lincoln. Martin Luther King Jr. Every single one of you as you dream about graduation day in May 2025.<\/p>\n

What do all these leaders have in common? They dared to imagine a reality beyond what they saw around them. They stepped out with some degree of faith, and likely a fair bit of trepidation, and went somewhere new. This generates a significant experience of cognitive dissonance, as we will see. As you probably have already experienced.<\/p>\n

In Leading Out of Who You Are: Discovering the Secret of\u00a0\u00a0Undefended Leadership,<\/em> author Simon Walker relies on two models of leadership to identify pitfalls and help leaders grow. He pulls from psychologist Erving Goffman\u2019s metaphor of a theater and elaborates how leaders maintain their \u201cfront stage\u201d and \u201cback stage\u201d behavior. This image speaks to the self-doubts and coping mechanisms that leaders may keep hidden from their public. But the \u201cback stage\u201d can also be used in more positive ways, for example by remaining modest about our contribution to a project in order to let a colleague receive the credit.[2]<\/a><\/p>\n

Secondly, Walker leans on John Bowlby\u2019s work to explain how a leader\u2019s attitudes and responses are rooted in his experience of trustworthy relationships growing up.[3]<\/a> In child psychology this is known as attachment theory, widely accepted to be foundational to children constructing their concepts of self. Here Walker spends a good bit of the book describing four \u201cEgos\u201d that could drive a given leader. This is where I, personally, found Walkers\u2019 work to become a bit too anecdotal and over-generalized to be very helpful.<\/p>\n

That said, I very much resonated with Walker\u2019s conclusion that \u201cthe problem did not originate and does not lie within us. The root of our problem does not consist in some flaw in our character which we may be able to fix\u2014no, it lies, and has always lain, in the formation of our relationships with others.\u201d[4]<\/a> Isn\u2019t that the gospel in a nutshell? My root problem is not something I can tweak or fix within myself, but rather my need for a greater reconciliation with God and with others. I love it when science, like attachment theory, and the reality of the natural world point us back to the gospel.<\/p>\n

So how do I \u201cfix\u201d this root problem that leads to so many other problems? Simply accept Jesus into my heart and everything will be fine? No, I think it\u2019s a little more involved than that. Walker suggests leaning into sources of \u201clove, affirmation and affection that can make us safe, can secure us against negative experiences in our own fragile histories: sources that are big enough, secure enough and unconditional enough to make us safe regardless of the threats that surround us.\u201d[5]<\/a> One participant in my Discovery workshop put it in terms of being securely rooted in Christ so that we can stay true to our principles in parenting. This is what Edwin Friedman called differentiation.<\/p>\n

Living securely in unconditional love recalls Bren\u00e9 Brown\u2019s work on vulnerability and wholeheartedness. She might use different vocabulary but she\u2019s getting at the same idea. In Daring Greatly<\/em>, she highlights the human need for relationship when she says, \u201cConnection is why we’re here. We are hardwired to connect with others, it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.\u201d[6]<\/a> We are designed with a deep need for reconciliation with God and with others.<\/p>\n

That brings us back to cognitive dissonance, defined as the discrepancy between the ideal and the reality.[7]<\/a> The ideal is connection and reconciliation with God and others. But the reality is that connection requires vulnerability and courage. Connection opens us up to being hurt. We naturally want to defend ourselves against criticism and hurt.<\/p>\n

But cognitive dissonance goes even deeper than opening ourselves up to criticism. We are citizens of the already-but-not-yet Kingdom. It\u2019s right there in our identity. Fallen but redeemed. No longer slaves to sin (Romans 6:6) and yet \u201calthough I want to do good, evil is right there with me.\u201d (Romans 7:21) \u00a0In fact, every time we pray for \u201cyour kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven\u201d (Matthew 6:10) we are leaning into cognitive dissonance. Let\u2019s be honest, this can be hard because sometimes that \u201cideal\u201d seems unattainable. I don\u2019t know how you experience it, but cognitive dissonance sometimes makes me feel like I\u2019m walking around in a fog. I can\u2019t see around me; I can\u2019t see clearly to solve the problems in my ministry. Author Rachel Held Evans shared her own struggles with living in this liminal state. She suggested that \u201cfaith teaches us to live\u00a0without<\/em>\u00a0certainty and to hope\u00a0without<\/em>\u00a0guarantee.\u201d[8]<\/a><\/p>\n

And yet, we can have hope (despite this post having taken a rather pessimistic turn). The thing that brings me hope is returning to the very definition of faith that we find in Hebrews 11:1. \u201cNow faith is confidence in what we hope for\u00a0and assurance about what we do not see.\u201d\u00a0 Above all, let\u2019s be leaders in faith. Let\u2019s be leaders who lead by faith. Take courage, friends, because \u201cThe One who calls you is faithful.\u201d (1 Thessalonians 5:24)<\/p>\n

_________________________________________________<\/p>\n

[1]<\/a> Walker, S.P. Leading Out of Who You Are: Discovering the Secret of Undefended Leadership<\/em>. The Undefended Leader Trilogy. 1. Piquant, 2007. Kindle location 208.<\/p>\n

[2]<\/a> Ibid. 38.<\/p>\n

[3]<\/a> Ibid. 71-72.<\/p>\n

[4]<\/a> Ibid. 126.<\/p>\n

[5]<\/a> Ibid. 127.<\/p>\n

[6]<\/a> Brown, Bren\u00e9. Daring Greatly: How the courage to be vulnerable transforms the way we live, love, parent and lead. Avery: New York, New York. 2015. 8.<\/p>\n

[7]<\/a> Walker, S.P. Leading Out of Who You Are: Discovering the Secret of Undefended Leadership<\/em>. The Undefended Leader Trilogy. 1. Piquant, 2007. 28.<\/p>\n

[8]<\/a> Held Evans, Rachel. Wholehearted Faith. <\/em>HarperOne: New York. 2021. 22.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cA leader leads people from where they currently are to another place, which at first is unknown to them and can\u00a0only be imagined.\u201d[1] Moses. Hudson Taylor. Abraham Lincoln. Martin Luther King Jr. Every single one of you as you dream about graduation day in May 2025. What do all these leaders have in common? They […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":186,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2310],"tags":[2489,1718],"class_list":["post-31817","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-doctor-of-leadership-3","tag-dlgp02","tag-walker","cohort-dlgp02"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31817","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/186"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=31817"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31817\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":31818,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31817\/revisions\/31818"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=31817"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=31817"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=31817"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}