{"id":19078,"date":"2018-09-20T21:27:03","date_gmt":"2018-09-21T04:27:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dminlgp\/?p=19078"},"modified":"2018-09-20T21:27:03","modified_gmt":"2018-09-21T04:27:03","slug":"can-you-use-locked-and-loaded-in-a-sentence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/can-you-use-locked-and-loaded-in-a-sentence\/","title":{"rendered":"Can you use \u2018locked and loaded\u2019 in a sentence?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Sure I can. When my cohort calls me out in a Zoom meeting and Jason puts me on the spot, my amygdala is \u2018locked &amp; loaded\u2019. That means I rapidly descend into the \u2018fight, flight, or freeze\u2019 mode of brain function according to Judith Glaser. At least this book helped me understand what I was feeling and why I was reacting that way.<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-19084 alignright\" src=\"http:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dminlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Unknown-3.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"195\" height=\"149\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Unknown-3.jpeg 257w, https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Unknown-3-150x114.jpeg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 195px) 100vw, 195px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>So, in building on last week\u2019s book of entrepreneurial leadership we come to recognize the manner in which our conversations are determined by brain patterns. Glaser opens the door to understanding how our interaction with people should be based on dialogue rather than presenting information for someone else to digest. One of the key applications that could be taken by Christian leaders from this text is that we need to be developing conversations rather than talking \u2018at\u2019 people as if we were selling a product. As a teacher in the world of higher education I can attest to the fact that students are much more receptive to information if they feel they are part of the process and have a role to play in the conversation.<\/p>\n<p>The Church has much to learn from this information. <em>\u201cGlaser urges us to become curious about others\u2019 perspectives, knowledge and success.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn1\" name=\"_ftnref1\">[1]<\/a> It seems to me that too often we find ourselves <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-19083 alignleft\" src=\"http:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dminlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Unknown-1-1.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"232\" height=\"149\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Unknown-1-1.jpeg 280w, https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Unknown-1-1-150x96.jpeg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 232px) 100vw, 232px\" \/>trying to \u2018defend\u2019 the faith or working to convince others of its correctness, rather than engaging with them in a dialogue about what makes meaning in their lives and how a relationship with Jesus is what is the foundation of ours. There is no basis for the amygdala to fire if we are simply sharing life stories in an open and amiable dialogue. There are some powerful thoughts that could\/should be immediately applied to our ministry contexts. Glaser reminds us that; \u201c<em>We often put the greatest trust in those with whom we can disagree without negative consequences.<\/em>\u201d\u00a0<a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn2\" name=\"_ftnref2\">[2]<\/a> Are we willing and able to develop relationships of trust on a foundation that is comfortable with disagreement?<\/p>\n<p>Again, as always, I desire to place this in the context of emerging generations. They live in a world where authority figures and institutions are only given respect once they have demonstrated themselves to be trustworthy. From my experience, \u2018trustworthy\u2019 is generally not the first thought in<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-19082 alignright\" src=\"http:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dminlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/images-4.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"299\" height=\"169\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/images-4.jpeg 299w, https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/images-4-150x85.jpeg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 299px) 100vw, 299px\" \/> the minds of young people when they think of Church or Christian ministry. When they pass churches every day with their hokey signs attempting to be clever and convince people to think the same way they do, the \u2018correct\u2019 way, emerging generations feel their amygdala lighting up. (My favorite is the local church that used this lovely sign in the Christmas season: <strong>\u201cOh Come All Ye Faithless\u201d<\/strong>. Let me tell you all those nasty heathens were lining up outside that church for Christmas worship.) The challenge for those of us who wish to convey the Gospel in a different manner is that we represent an institution that for many is narrow-minded, bigoted, and in full \u2018Tell, Sell, Yell\u2019 operating mode. <a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn3\" name=\"_ftnref3\">[3]<\/a> Turning this around in the minds of emerging generations presents a significant struggle. Glaser again is helpful here; <em>\u201cOnce we have a bad experience and begin to become distrustful of someone, that notion becomes embedded in our brain and can be difficult to dislodge.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn4\" name=\"_ftnref4\">[4]<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Though he was called Rabbi, I believe that Jesus embodied many of the principles of Conversational Intelligence. I wonder, is it likely that Jesus understood the need for Conversational Intelligence and the inner workings of the brain? Whether or not he did, rather than providing propositional statements in the manner depicted by the Pharisees in the Gospel accounts, he told stories and invited people to come to their own conclusions about their meaning. <em>\u201cTo the one who has ears to hear, let them hear<\/em>.\u201d <a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn5\" name=\"_ftnref5\">[5]<\/a> It does not appear from the accounts we have that Jesus ever felt much need to defend his position, nor was he particularly threatened by those who disagreed with him. That is not to say that he was unemotional or lacked conviction. It just seems that he was content to allow people to accept or condemn themselves on their own terms. Jesus was a consummate relationship builder and demonstrates the truth highlighted by Glaser when she states; <em>\u201cLack of Conversational Intelligence is at the root of breakdowns in many relationships.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn6\" name=\"_ftnref6\">[6]<\/a><\/p>\n<p>I am reticent to make too many generalizations about the contemporary Western Church. Ha! Who am I kidding? You all know that\u2019s my favorite thing to do. I think for many of us concerned about the <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-19081 alignleft\" src=\"http:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dminlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/images-1-1.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"180\" height=\"120\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/images-1-1.jpeg 275w, https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/images-1-1-150x100.jpeg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 180px) 100vw, 180px\" \/>apparent numerical decline that has occurred in the past couple of decades we have become trapped in many of the habits that Glaser warns against. We work hard to put words together that we think will appropriately convey the \u2018truth\u2019 (often our version of the truth) we think people need in order to convince them or save them. But I fear that; <em>\u201cWe are so engrossed in what we have to say that we don\u2019t realize we are carrying on our own monologues, not dialogues.&#8221;\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn7\" name=\"_ftnref7\">[7]<\/a><\/p>\n<p>If we desire to avail ourselves of the insights provided by Conversational Intelligence and if we hope to restore dialogue with emerging generations, rather than monologues, we might begin by asking ourselves a question posed in the introduction to the book. <em>\u201cHow can you create the conversational space that creates deeper understanding and engagement rather than fear and avoidance.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn8\" name=\"_ftnref8\">[8]<\/a> Each of us should consider answering that question in a way suitable to our own context. If we apply the lessons learned from last week\u2019s book, we will work to develop 100 or more potential answers. <a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn9\" name=\"_ftnref9\">[9]<\/a>\u00a0In the end, I think the quote that begins chapter 12 gets to the heart of what would best engage those outside the Church. <em>\u201cIf you want to build a ship, don\u2019t drum up people together to collect wood, and don\u2019t assign them tasks and work but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn10\" name=\"_ftnref10\">[10]<\/a> The Gospel as presented by us should be something that creates a longing to know God and experience a relationship with Jesus. If we work to foster conversations around that, in groups small and large, we may begin to break down the walls of distrust and provide a platform for meaningful, transparent community. And, whatever we do, don\u2019t serve iced coffee. <a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftn11\" name=\"_ftnref11\">[11]<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref1\" name=\"_ftn1\">[1]<\/a>Bowman, Judith. \u201cBook Review &#8211; Conversational Intelligence.\u201d\u00a0<em>Book Review &#8211; Conversational Intelligence<\/em>, www.protocolconsultants.com\/features\/conversational_intelligence.html. Accessed 21 Sept. 2018.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref2\" name=\"_ftn2\">[2]<\/a>Glaser, Judith E.\u00a0<em>Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results<\/em>. Brookline, MA: Bibliomotion, 2016. P. 24<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref3\" name=\"_ftn3\">[3]<\/a>Ibid p. 87<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref4\" name=\"_ftn4\">[4]<\/a>Glaser, Judith E.\u00a0<em>Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results<\/em>. Brookline, MA: Bibliomotion, 2016. P. 28<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref5\" name=\"_ftn5\">[5]<\/a>Matthew 11:15<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref6\" name=\"_ftn6\">[6]<\/a>Ibid. p. xxi<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref7\" name=\"_ftn7\">[7]<\/a>Ibid. p. 64<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref8\" name=\"_ftn8\">[8]<\/a>Ibid. p. xxx<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref9\" name=\"_ftn9\">[9]<\/a>Seelig, Tina.\u00a0<em>Insight out: Get Ideas out of Your Head and into the World<\/em>. Harper One Publ., 2015.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref10\" name=\"_ftn10\">[10]<\/a>Glaser, Judith E.\u00a0<em>Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results<\/em>. Brookline, MA: Bibliomotion, 2016. P. 183<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/\/D893DD64-22C0-4C5B-9ED5-B5D6144CD21E#_ftnref11\" name=\"_ftn11\">[11]<\/a>Ibid. p. 180<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sure I can. When my cohort calls me out in a Zoom meeting and Jason puts me on the spot, my amygdala is \u2018locked &amp; loaded\u2019. That means I rapidly descend into the \u2018fight, flight, or freeze\u2019 mode of brain function according to Judith Glaser. At least this book helped me understand what I was [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":98,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[1351,1350],"class_list":["post-19078","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-conversational-intelligence","tag-glaser","cohort-lgp8"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19078","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/98"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19078"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19078\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19085,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19078\/revisions\/19085"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19078"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19078"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.georgefox.edu\/dlgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19078"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}